Lordyam reads the original Conan tales. Feel free to comment

[lordyam]

A few years ago I did a lets read of the DH comics. I've decided to revive the lets read...but this time I'm going to do the original Howard Tales themselves. The format is simple. I'll give a recap of each chapter with my feelings on each afterwards; longer stories may take more than one post to cover, 

Bit of a heads up. These reviews are going to be honest and if I see something that I perceive as racist or sexist I WILL call it out. I understand that Robert E Howard was a skilled writer and that sword and sorcery owes him a lot of debt. I also think that the guys on Ferretbrain were silly to completely dismiss him, but the truth is that Howard WAS a man of his day and certain elements have NOT aged well at all. That doesn't mean that I hate the story, or that I think it's worthless, just making an acknowledgement of fact. I might also make commentary on how I might have done certain things instead. However I will also acknowledge that compared to stalwarts such as Deuce, johnnypt Jason Aiken and even Von Kamblach that I am a neophyte when it comes to Howard's oeuvre so please feel free to correct me if I get things wrong or am missing key context.

So without further ado let's dive in.

[lordyam]

The Phoenix on the Sword Part 1

Chapter 1:

Recap: 4 men leave a house in the dead of night, after which the slave sends them away. He returns to the rooms of his master Ascalante and through their conversation we get exposition. The 4 men who just left are "Volmana, the dwarfish count of Karaban; Gromel, the Giant Commander of the Black Legion; Dion, the fat baron of Attalus; Rinaldo the hare-brained minstrel." It's quickly established that while they see Ascalante as their pawn HE'S the one in control of them, and we're given helpful exposition to explain why each of these guys are involved in the plot (Dion has some royal blood and fancies himself as the next King of Aquilonia. Volmana's an aristocrat who's fallen on hard times since Conan came to power and wants to restore his old privileges and estates. Gromel simply hates Pallantides (the Commander of the Elite Black Dragon guard) and wants to control the entire army rather than just the black legion. Rinaldo as it turns out is the only idealist of the bunch, and idealizes the old king for his occasional patronage of the arts while ignoring all the horrible things that king has done.

We also are given the outline of Ascalante's diabolical plan. Turns out that Ascalante, despite being a bandit for a while, used to be a statesman and he's put that to work undermining Conan, with each of the conspirators playing a role. He's smuggled alcohol to the Pict tribes that live on the frontier border in order to incite them to attack (Dion's money was used to make that possible.) Volmana was able to have his "princely kin" persuade King Numa of neighboring Nemedia to request Conan's seneschal Count Trocero (for formalities sake he'll be accompanied by all his troops, as well as an imperial escort, as well as Conan's second in command Prospero), leaving only Gromel's soldiers and Conan's bodyguards. Gromel will bribe a member of the bodyguard to lead Conan's bodyguard away at the right time and will after Conan's death will allow them to hold the city even if the people don't approve of the regime change. Rinaldo is working on laying the groundwork for people to accept the new regime by singing songs lionizing the King Conan overthrew. Ascalante was brought in as muscle but has quickly rediscovered his old ambitions and is planning to overthrow Dion before crushing all those who oppose him, leaving Ascalante as King of Aquilonia.

The slave (Thoth-Amon) is unimpressed, saying the the once had ambitions that make Ascalante's seem childish by comparison. He also laments that his former compatriots and rivals would scarcely believe how low he's fallen by serving an outland bandit. He argues that if he had his magic ring HE would be the master not Ascalante. Ascalante is unimpressed by this, and when Thoth gets impudent hits him across the face before reminding him that he has put safeguards in place that will ensure Thoth's rivals will discover him and kill him if Ascalante were to die. He orders Thoth to go to Dion (who has been ordered to hide out in his country estate until the coup goes down), and to make sure that he doesn't do anything stupid like blab the plan before it happens. Thoth reluctantly complies and rides off into the morning light.

Chapter 2:

Recap: We meet King Conan and Prospero. Conan is slaving over Papyrus documents (seems paper doesn't exist in the Hyborian Age) and we're quickly shown that Conan is NOT a conventional king. It's quickly shown that Conan is rather unhappy and wishes that he could travel with Prospero to Nemedia. He finds that statecraft exhausts him far more than all the fighting he ever did as a warrior and sell-sword, and that actually RUNNING the kingdom is far harder than the act of overthrowing the dynasty (and even THAT seemed downright difficult at the time). He's also bothered by how fickle the people are in regards to the old monarch. In a short time they've gone from praising Conan as a liberator to mourning the death of the old king....even people who were tortured, lost their sons or saw their wives and daughters be dragged off to be used as sex slaves (he also points out that they were all to willing to overlook his service when he was a foreigner leading their mercenary armies to victory).

Prospero argues that Rinaldo is largely responsible for the public turnabout in praising Numidides, and suggests that Conan just hang the guy from the battlements. Conan refuses, arguing that Rinaldo's skill as a poet and singer will give him far greater longevity than even Conan himself and admitting that even HE is moved by Rinaldo's songs. He also admits that he senses some underlying tension; it's not a coincidence that the Picts are moving NOW of all times. Prospero disagrees that Conan should have ridden with the troops, arguing that Publius feared a trap if he rode to the frontier. He also thinks that Conan's barbarian upbringing is making him paranoid. Nothing can harm him in the city with his bodyguards surrounding him (oh Prospero if only you knew). He asks Conan what he's doing and Conan happily explains that he's updating the maps in the archives. While the map accurately shows the countries in the east west and south they are woefully inaccurate about the North. He proudly shows Prospero Cimmeria, as well as Asgard and Vanaheim. Prospero is rather taken aback seeing as he almost believed the later two were fables but Conan is all too happy to set him straight and gives both him (and the audience) exposition on their location, the appearance of the people and their cultural ways. Prospero points out that Conan seems more like an Aesir than a Cimmerian, and Conan agrees. He argues that it may be that Cimmeria is a darker and more moody land than the lands of the Aesir (we also learn that the Cimmerian view of the afterlife is.....rather bleak. Crom and his "dark race" rule over a land of sunless mist, which is apparently the Cimmerian view of the afterlife.)

Prospero gives him a hearty goodbye, promising to drink whine for him in Nemedia's court. Conan appreciates and jokingly tells him to "kiss Numa's dancing-girls for yourself only, lest you involve the states" (That's a bit of an oddly worded passage but okay.) With that Prospero takes his leave.

Observations:

Chapter 1
1.) The Black Dragons and the Black Legion seem to be separate units in the military. I have to wonder what the difference is.
2.) If Trocero is just going for a visit why will he bring all those people with him? Seems rather excessive for just a visit.
3.) How does the safeguard work? Ascalante says that if Thoth were to kill him by stealth or treachery a hermit would know and then open a seal on a manuscript, which would in turn ensure that "a word would be whispered in Stygia, and a wind will creep up from south by midnight". Seems......a little elaborate. I get that there's probably magic involved somehow but it still seems unusual.

Chapter 2
1.) As mentioned in the recap Conan writes on Papyrus. Interesting aesthetic choice but it makes sense and even adds a sense of uniqueness.
2.) We never get the exact details of how Numidides was overthrown. We're only told that it involved "toil, intrigue, slaughter and tribulation" and that it was implied to have been both difficult and wild.
3.) While Aquilonia seems to have accurate maps of the East South and West the north seems to be unexplored. Even Prospero (a noble in court) seems surprised to learn that Asgard and Vanaheim exist even though by his own admission he's met other Cimmerians besides Conan. Seems the Vanir and Aesir are more reclusive than even the Cimmerians.
4.) Conan has "scars" on his face. Interesting

[lordyam]

The Phoenix on the Sword Part 2

Chapter 3:

We open with a poem about the darkness of Stygia and Set before we get back to Thoth, who is babysitting Dion. Dion quickly lives up to his reputation as a deeply paranoid man and Thoth tries to reassure him that everything's fine there's nothing to worry about, and when Dion says Ascalante may make a mistake Thoth bitterly comments "Not he, else I had been not his slave but his master." This comment breaks through Dion's veil of self interest and arouses his slight curiosity. Thoth, who is near the breaking point, decides to try his luck by explaining his life story to Dion and asking for his protection. We get the backstory that was hinted at in chapter 1. Thoth WAS a powerful wizard in the south, who was hated by his fellows yet also feared due to his control of creatures from "outside". He was honored by the king above all others, and it was all thanks to his magical ring (which he found "in a tomb a league beneath the earth forgotten before the first man climbed out of the slimy sea.") Unfortunately his ring somehow got stolen, which evidently broke his power enough for the wizards to gang up on him and try to kill him. Thoth was forced to flee disguised as a camel driver, where he was able to flee to Koth before Ascalante's bandits wiped out all but him. Thoth survived only by revealing his identity and pledging himself to Ascalante, under who he has suffered ever since. He also tells Dion about the measures Ascalante placed (the hermit will read his name and this will somehow cause Thoth's name and whereabouts to be sent to his rivals in Stygia). He begs Dion for protection, feeling that only a king with an army of swordsmen would be able to protect him. As such Thoth proposes a deal, offering wisdom in exchange for protection. Who knows he may even find his ring.....

At this Dion cuts him off and makes it clear he hasn't been paying ANY attention to Thoth at all. It's only the reference to a ring that sparks his attentions. Dion mentions his "ring of good fortune". He mentions that he bought it from a Shemite thief who claimed to have "stolen it from a wizard in the South". Gee, I wonder where this is going. Sure enough as Thoth stares in shock and anger at both Dion's rudeness and stupidity Dion digs through a secret compartment in his chair and after sifting through various jewelry pulls out the ring. Sure enough it IS Thoth's ring and so Thoth, pushed to his limits finally lashes out and stabs Dion to death. After some time (it's sunset when the scene starts, by the time Thoth is out of his reverie the moon has risen) Thoth pulls himself together and decides that since he has his ring back he will get his revenge upon Ascalante. He rubs some of Dion's blood on the jeweled eyes of his serpent ring and than utters an incantation begging Set to grant him a servant. Ultimately this works, as a hideous demon (we don't get a full description other than that it kinda looks like a baboon, albeit a really unearthly one.) Thoth, not even bothering to look, tosses the beast one of Ascalante's sandals, which he was always keeping on his person just for the purpose that he might someday be able to use it against Ascalante and orders the demon to "Find him who wore it and destroy him! Look into his eyes and blast his soul, before you tear out his throat! Kill him!" He then adds, largely on impulse "Aye! and all with him!" The creature takes it's leave and heads off into the night. A guard on duty sees it leap over the walls but it's gone so quickly that he dismisses it as a hallucination

Chapter 4

Recap: After another poem (this time from Epimitreus's perspective) we cut back to Conan, who's sleeping. In his dreams he hears a voice calling it to him through grey mists. He follows it with his sword in hand and as he gets closer he realizes that it's calling out for him across space and time. He eventually sees the mists clear to find that he's in a corridor "cut out of solid black stone", and carved with various images of gods and heroes. He comes to some stairs that are amusingly carved to resemble Set, and in such a way that Conan will be stepping on his head every time he climbs a stair. The creepy symbols bother him somewhat but guided by the voice he continues on until he eventually arrives in a crypt where an old guy with a white beard is sitting on a throne. When Conan doesn't recognize him the wizard introduces himself as Epemitreus (which surprises Conan since Epimitreus has been dead for 1500 years). Epimitreus explains that "happenings in the unseen world" have woken him, and as such he sees Conan as someone who has accomplished a great deal. However there are "dooms" that are on the loose and his sword can't help him.

Conan is confused but says that if Epimitreus lets him see his foe than he will kill him. Epimitreus explains that he is not shielding Conan from men, and explains that there are "dark worlds barely guessed by man, wherein formless monsters stalk-fiends which may be drawn from the Outer Voids to take material shape and rend and devour at the bidding of evil magicians." He further tells Conan that he has sensed "Set's neophyte" and detected that he is not only drunk with power but may well bring down the entire kingdom in his quest for revenge. As such he has decided to give Conan a weapon to face the beast. Conan is confused; while he knows that Epimitreus sometimes comes from sleep to aid Aquilonia in times of peril (wait why did you seem so shocked to see Epimitreus in the first place) he himself is an outlander and barbarian. Epimitreus explains that Conan's destiny is one with Aquilonia and he won't let a crazy sorcerer tear down Aquilonia's "imperial destiny". We also find out that back in the day Set's rule once encircled the entire planet before Epimitreus (who lived for three times the span of a mortal man) was able to force him into the south after years of battle. Even now he fights Set's acolytes.

He asks Conan to hold out his sword. Conan does so and Epemitreus traces a glowing symbol. The dream ends and Conan finds himself awake......and in his hand he's holding a sword with a glowing symbol. This weirds Conan out, especially since one of the carvings he saw was a phoenix emblazoned on the tomb. Conan is startled out of his reverie by the sounds of footsteps, so he immediately puts on his armor.


Chapter 5:

Recap: After an opening from another poem (this one was also featured in chapter 2) called the road of kings. 20 men quietly sneak through the palace, armed with weapons. Ascalante is on edge, ordering someone to stop breathing loudly, since he doesn't want to take any chances even if the guards are either drunk or away. They hide as a young officer (who we learn has gambling debts that have compelled him to help even though he doesn't really want to) leads ten guards away. The conspirators continue on and eventually arrive at the door to Conan's be chamber. Ascalante orders Gromel to break the door down, and they all move to charge in.....only to get stare in shock to see that Conan is not asleep but alive and armed (he didn't QUITE have time to fully dress himself in armor though). After a tense standoff Ascalante orders the men forwards, forcing Conan to focus on surviving. He manages to kill Gromel first (though he breaks his sword in the process and smashes another guys brains out with the broken hilt. As Ascalante orders 5 of his men back to watch the door Conan seizes the opportunity to grab a battle axe conveniently hanging on the nearby wall. Conan doesn't expect to survive but he'll be damned if he doesn't take as many of his attackers with him as he can. He stands his ground and manages to kill quite a few of his opponents despite suffering a few injuries. However his hesitation to kill Rinaldo allows the later to wound him non mortally on the side. The rogues back Conan into a corner, but hesitate because Conan's still dangerous in the sense that a cornered animal is dangerous. Conan throws down the gauntlet, nearly killing Ascalante and successfully killing yet another rogue.

At that precise moment the rogues who are on guard duty scream in horror. The others (save Ascalante) immediately run for the hills. Ascalante and Conan are both focused on the other and Ascalante begins to rush forwards as soon as Conan stops to wipe blood from his eye (even after cutting off his villainous monologue to do it smart boy).....only to be grabbed by a dark force at the precise moment he begins to charge. The creature grabs him, tosses him around and is generally so terrifying that Ascalante dies of fright before the beast's fangs can even touch him (he also sees Thoth Amon's visage in the creature's face, so he knows EXACTLY who sent the monster). Conan of course is horrified by this, only realizing after a few seconds that the creature isn't "a hound nor a baboon". Nevertheless he charges the thing with his axe....only for the axe to be sent glancing away by what's implied to be the beast's unusual evil. Conan is able to guard his throat with his arm (Though the beast is able to injure his arm in the process), and the beast stares into Conan's eyes with the same darkness that drove Ascalante mad. The darkness of the void. However Conan is made of sterner stuff than Ascalante and is roused to anger. He wrenches his arm back (injuring it in the process) and pulls the beast with him. He reaches out desperately and manages to grab the hilt of his sword. He lashes out and as luck would have it the dagger does its job. The beast releases Conan's arm and dies after thrashing in agony for a little while (it also dissolves into a disgusting goo).

At this point the rest of the castle shows up. Lords ladies even the Black Dragons show up (we find out that the young officer who led the men away just vanishes). The high councilor, the aforementioned Publius, is disgusted to see Gromel Volmana and Rinaldo amongst the dead and orders the guard to be called, only to be shut up by Pallantides. Pallantides orders him to help bind Conan's injuries so he doesn't bleed to death. Conan, despite his wounds asks for wine. After the blood flow stops Conan's "natural vitality" heals him. The commander of the guard is shocked to recognize Ascalante (who was apparently the Count of Thune), while Publius wonders why he died with horror on his face. Conan gestures to the monster.....only to see that the spot where it died is gone. One of the nobles thinks Conan is insane, but Conan isn't having any of that and names Epemitreus (Which some nobles whisper at). He describes the corridor and the tomb in intricate detail, which so alarms the High Priest of Mitra that he actually breaks protocol and orders Conan to shut up.

Conan...is annoyed but the priest quickly calms Conan down and whispers in his ear that only the most elite of the Mitran priests know the details of what Conan just described. Conan insists that he spoke to Epemitreus, and describes how the guy made a mark on his sword that ensured the demon's death even though the sword was broken. The priest asks to see it, and sure enough the priest notices the mark. He immediately declares that Conan is telling the truth and gestures for the people to look at the spot again. Turns out that a broken screen had obscured the view and once THAT'S taken care of they see the outline of the monster.....and it is ugly. Ugly enough to send people to either there knees or fleeing from the chamber.

Observation:
Chapter 3:
1.) Who is this Rammon that Thoth mentions? He must have been a pretty big deal.
2.) For all the details that Thoth goes into about his past there are still some questions. Who was he before he found the ring? How was it stolen? Why was loosing the ring sufficient to break his power? Dark Horse Comics tried to give Thoth a backstory in 2006, to.....divisive reactions. While I enjoyed it overall I understand that it went against a lot of established canon and some of the story elements were kinda "wha?" Notably Thoth is described as coming from humble origins whereas in the story he's a "somber giant whose dusky skin revealed his stygian blood", which has led some Howardians to conclude that he was of noble birth.
3.) Building on 2 how strong IS Thoth without the ring? Does he have power on his own but the ring amplifies it or is he utterly powerless without it?
4.) Stygia has baboons. Maybe they're an exotic animal.

Chapter 4:
1.) The "across time and space" is sort of unusual. Is it calling Conan into the past? Some realm beyond time? In Sorrow of Akivasha (which yes is a pastiche) Akivasha is contacted from the future when the Prince reads her name and she's able to have a conversation with the Prince, even giving him handy advice about Thoth. Is this similar?
2.) Who are the "Nameless Old ones?" Howard never follows up on this as far as I know

Chapter 5
1.) Leeches are used to heal Conan. Howard really did do his homework.
2.) We get a fair bit of worldbuilding about the church of Mitra. Apparently the nature of the tomb is one of the inner mysteries of the cult.

Review: As an intro story this is fantastic. Howard's prose, while a little purple at times, does a fantastic job of conveying the scene. I truly felt like I was immersed in a world gone by. The atmosphere felt real and alive in my mind as I read it, and more impressive is that Howard was able to subtly hint at other elements of his world (though regrettably not a lot of pastiches followed up on them. You could easily do a story about the guard officer trying to redeem himself for instance.)

His grasp of character was also fantastic even if some of them (such as Gromel and Volmana) are only talked about. I found it telling that the first time we ever see Conan is when he's slaving over the work of running a kingdom. They say a first moment establishes how you see a character and if so Howard hit it out of the park. In less than 4 pages Howard manages to establish Conan as a rogue and sellsword who chafes under rulership and wants to just get out again. However we also see Conan's more mirthful side in his interactions with Prospero, who is perfectly fine being casual with Conan despite how Conan outranks him. When we finally see Conan in action he proves that he deserves his reputation even as it's made clear that the only reason he survived was because Thoth's demon killed Ascalante and drove most of the other rogues away.

Speaking of....Thoth. I do get the feeling Howard was laying some groundwork with Thoth. This guy isn't a mastermind, though he is said to have been in the past. In fairness we're seeing the guy after he's been laid low but as someone who's read the pastiches it's a jarring difference. He doesn't even come across as caring about Conan all that much; even his declaration of "aye and all with him" is done in a moment of passion. If it weren't for God in the Bowl I doubt anyone would remember him.

This story really works best when approaching it as an introductory novel. If you read it AFTER all the other Conan stories all descriptions come across as "As you know" wherein the person is telling someone something they already know, and even then there may be hints of Early Installment Weirdness (Howard is still laying out the world and so some elements may not QUITE jibe with later depictions). The description of the Picts and alcohol does raise an eyebrow though, but I won't get into that until we actually get further into details about the Picts.

All things said, a FANTASTIC introduction to the character. 4 out of 5

[lordyam]

I decided to start with the next King Conan tale for continuity's sake, which is also fittingly the first Conan tale that WASN'T a reworking of a King Kull tale.

So without further ado, let's dive into the Scarlet Citadel

Chapter 1:

Recap: We open up in the closing phases of a battle. Apparently, King Conan had ridden south with 5000 knights to aid his ally King Amalrus of Ophir......only to find that Amalrus had ALLIED with his alleged attacker King Strabonus of Koth. They outnumbered Conan immensely but Conan still had his men charge through. They fought valiantly and managed to take out quite a few enemies but in the end it was too much. Of the 5,001 men on the Aquilonian side, only Conan himself remains, cutting down enemies. The three architects of this (King Strabonus of Koth, King Amalrus of Ophir, and Tsotha-lanti, a Kothian wizard with an INCREDIBLY fearsome reputation and the guy who wields the REAL power behind the throne) ride through the lines. Strabonus wants to just have Conan feathered with arrows and be done with it (partially because Conan is taking out the swordsmen he spent YEARS training and a lot money on) but Tsotha insists on Conan being taken alive. Strabonus is skeptical but Tsotha disembarks and argues "Have you not learned by this time that my brain is mightier than any sword?" He moves forward (the troops all move back to avoid touching his robes) and comes face to face with Conan, mockingly offering him life. Conan isn't impressed and starts to swing his sword but Tsotha displays surprisingly fast reflexes and incapacitates Conan just by touching his arm. This causes Conan to collapse mid swing. Tsotha laughs and tells his soldiers they can move forwards. "The lion's fangs are drawn."

As the kings ride up Amalrus is a little uneasy and asks what he did. Tsotha demonstrates a ring on his finger that releases a spike when pressed against another finger and explains that it is coated in purple lotus juice from the swamps of southern Stygia. The purple lotus produces temporary paralysis, which is rather handy in this situation. Tsotha orders Conan placed in a chariot; it's time to leave. Strabonus gives orders to his generals to go on ahead to Ophir, which will resupply them. Strabby, Amalrus, Tsotha and the royal cavalry will return with the wounded. With this done they head out, with Conan loaded in one of the chariots that carry the wounded. As they journey Conan thinks about his predicament, and we learn that he had come with more men than planned AND in completely good faith to save Amalrus's men from Strabonus's degredations. Unable to move Conan reflects on his life (From being a barbarian clad in skins to a mercenary with a "horned helmet" and "scale-mail corselet; as a corsair raiding the southern coasts in a dragon prowed galley. To leading hosts of armies on a black charger, to finally being king) but it all leads back here to him in this wagon. He's furious at his helplessness, able to take only some joy in the screams of the wounded besides him. Over midnight they cross the border into Ophir, and by dawn they've arrived to Khorshemish. So quickly in fact that the people didn't even have news of the battle. Conan's paralysis is starting to wear off, and he tries to get a good look at Khorshemish (Which is considered "Queen of the South"). He laughs at the irony; he had wanted to enter the city as a conquerer. Instead he entered as the conquered. His laughter scares the guards, who think it sounds like a "rousing lion".

Notes:
1.) Oiliphant instruments are used apparently. Maybe Koth has better access to the black kingdoms to be able to acquire elephant tusks
2.) Strabonus employs Shemitic archers to attack Conan's knights and they are said to be VERY effective. Strangely we don't hear of Conan doing this; maybe it's a more southernly kingdoms thing.
3.) Given that Conan thought Amalrus was an ally Amalrus has got to be a VERY good actor to be able to convince someone as aware of Civilization's treachery as Conan.
4.) We find that Conan's saga "was the basis of a while cycle of hero-tales". Seems Conan's built up quite the reputation
5.) Southern Stygia has swamps where they grow the purple lotus flower.
6.) Minaretted mosques appear.
7.) Interestingly Strabonus doesn't actually live in the Scarlet Citadel. Tsotha does and he can look down on Tsotha's palace. Yet more proof of who the REAL power behind the throne is.

[lordyam]

I will be following up. Thing is I work on weekends and it's annoying.

[lordyam]

Chapter II

We open up with yet another excerpt from the Road of Kings poem before jumping into the action. Conan is bond before Tsotha and the two monarchs, but somehow his presence means that despite his beat up situation he still somehow manages to come off as stronger than the two monarchs, who are both terrified of him. Only Tsotha isn't bothered and rather quickly cuts to the chase; all three want to expand "their empire", which Conan points out means they just want his kingdom. Amalrus argues that Conan was just an adventurer who took Aquilonia by force when he had no claim, and says they're willing to offer compensation. Conan is unamused and gives an awesome speech about why the whole "divine right of kings" is bullshit, pointing out that their fathers did the actual fighting and just gave the crown to them, and what little work they did involved poisoning a few brothers whereas Conan fought for his (which makes Conan more qualified to rule than them. He also points out that under HIS rule taxes are lower than anywhere and even the rich dare not mistreat the humblest of Conan's subjects, whereas Strabonus and Amalrus both tax their people relentlessly AND are dealing with civil wars and unrest even at this moment; the entire thing is a naked attempt at a power grab. Hillariously Tsotha doesn't even deny it, but insists that Conan sign the parchment, saying they'll give him armor and money and escort him to the border when he signs an abdication in favor of Prince Arpello.

Conan doesn't go for it, saying he'd be where he was before but with the added burden of a traitor's name. After pointing out how they plan to rule through Arpello he once more tells them to go to hell. Amalrus is furious, and his rage grows more when Conan spits in his face. He tries to kill Conan over Tsotha's objections but again Tsotha interferes and throws dust in Amalrus's eyes that temporarily blind him. Tsotha threatens to make it permanent, causing Amalrus to immediately become servile. Tsotha gestures to the black guards and they immediately take Conan deep deep into the darkest prisons of the castle, below even the hill (which is so creepy that the guards and sadistic head torturer Shukeli are creeped out). Eventually Conan is chained to a wall, and Tsotha (who led the guards down) dismisses the men before taunting Conan with the fact that once he takes the capital in about ten days or so he'll kill Conan's harem girls and use their skins as parchment. Conan curses impotently, drawing a laugh from Tsotha, who leaves the room trapping Conan in the dark

Observation:
1.) Instead of slave girls we get slave boys. Interesting choice. Is Howard implying the kings are bi/gay?
2.) I'm interested in the fact that Conan contrasts the internal stability of his own kingdom and the treatment of the poor with those of Strabonus and Amalrus. Seems Conan's been rather busy.
3.) I'm struck by just HOW blatant Tsotha is. For all their blustering it's pretty clear that Strabonus and Amalrus are terrified of Tsotha and will do whatever he says.

[thulsadoom]

I haven’t looked at these message boards in sooo long, but I just popped in and saw what you were doing here. I just wanted to say that what comes next is one of my favorite sections of any Conan story, and some of the most effective horror I’ve ever read.

It’s noteworthy because Conan is so unnerved by things he sees down there that he just straight up panics and runs, not once, not twice, but THREE times, if I recall correctly. Quite unlike our favorite Cimmerian!

[thulsadoom]

Oct 25, 2019 14:28:43 GMT -5 lordyam said:

Observations:

Chapter 1
1.) The Black Dragons and the Black Legion seem to be separate units in the military. I have to wonder what the difference is.

I THINK his personal bodyguard, the Black Dragons, are a subset of a larger military unit known as the Black Legion. But I am not sure about this.

Chapter 2
2.) We never get the exact details of how Numidides was overthrown. We're only told that it involved "toil, intrigue, slaughter and tribulation" and that it was implied to have been both difficult and wild.

One interesting note we see in the next story is that Conan himself strangled Numidides, on the steps leading up to his throne.

[thulsadoom]

Oct 25, 2019 17:14:08 GMT -5 lordyam said:

Observation:
Chapter 3:
3.) Building on 2 how strong IS Thoth without the ring? Does he have power on his own but the ring amplifies it or is he utterly powerless without it?

I could be wrong here, but it has always seemed to me that the ring was the source of his real supernatural power. In contrast to all the stuff you see in the comics, in the REH stories people who are capable of real, genuine magic/summoning etc. seem to be pretty few and far between. Much more common is people who use the effects of drugs, pyrotechnics, etc. But once Thoth gets his ring back, he is a powerhouse again.

2.) Who are the "Nameless Old ones?" Howard never follows up on this as far as I know

I think here he references his buddy HP Lovecraft's mythos. He will do so again in "A Witch Shall Be Born" although I think what he does in that story is more of a sly dig at his friend Howard Phillip.

Review: As an intro story this is fantastic. Howard's prose, while a little purple at times, does a fantastic job of conveying the scene. I truly felt like I was immersed in a world gone by. 

Agree completely. Howard's Conan stuff is quite simply my favorite fantasy writings of all.

Speaking of....Thoth. I do get the feeling Howard was laying some groundwork with Thoth. This guy isn't a mastermind, though he is said to have been in the past. In fairness we're seeing the guy after he's been laid low but as someone who's read the pastiches it's a jarring difference. He doesn't even come across as caring about Conan all that much; even his declaration of "aye and all with him" is done in a moment of passion. If it weren't for God in the Bowl I doubt anyone would remember him.

And interestingly Conan and Thoth don't ever seem to be aware of one another, although twice Conan has run afoul of one of Thoth's plots.

[thulsadoom]

Oct 30, 2019 16:02:21 GMT -5 lordyam said:

Notes:
7.) Interestingly Strabonus doesn't actually live in the Scarlet Citadel. Tsotha does and he can look down on Tsotha's palace. Yet more proof of who the REAL power behind the throne is.

Yep... and the Citadel--where it is, and what it was built on top of--has a VERY interesting history, as we shall see.

[lordyam]

SO sorry to keep you all waiting. As penance I will try to do Chapter 3 today.

Chapter 3:

The chapter opens with an old ballad before diving into the action. Conan is trying to break free but the chains are strong enough to hold even him no matter how hard he struggles (though it is noted that a "lesser man" would have died from the sheer weight of his shackles). Conan is genuinely scared of his current situation as he looks into the darkness. He's a superstitious fellow even to this day and he can imagine seeing twisted shapes in the darkness. More importantly his reason is arguing that they aren't just imprisoning him. They want him to die horribly; while a part of Conan regrets taking the offer he also knows that given the same chance again he'd give the same answer. He also realizes that Tsotha has EVERY intention of acting on his threat to kill Conan's harem girls, which revolts him to the point where he releases an angry scream. This shocks him back and he reflects on his situation (and what he knows of Tsotha's reputation) and realizes that he is in the "Halls of Horror" where Tsotha does his twisted experiments. Conan hears a faint sound, and is horrified to realize that it's the sound of a snake slithering over stone. Sure enough he sees a "vague and colossal form" rising in the darkness, and generally doing the creepy things snakes do. As the form grows clearer we see the creature in all its glory and.....welp it's scary. I'll just quote the text.

"It was a snake that dwarfed all Conan's previous ideas of snakes. Eighty feet it stretched from its pointed tail to its triangular head, which was bigger than that of a horse. In the dim light its scales glistened coldly, white as hoar-frost." The beast gets closer, sizing Conan up, and Conan realizes that while he COULD break the beasts neck just like he did that of a python on the Stygian Coast (we also get the first hint of Conan's Corsair days here) chances are he'd probably die. Fear does the rest, and Conan remains motionless. As the snake investigates the torch some of the venom on its fangs drops onto Conan's leg (leaving a scar that he'll carry to the day he dies) but Conan is able to remain still despite the pain. Out of nowhere a door opens up and the serpent retreats into the darkness (since despite being a big guy he's still "suspicious as all its kind".) A figure enters and we see that it's a black man (who strangely enough is naked). He holds a sword in one hand and a ring of keys in the other. They speak in a coastal Kushite dialect, and the slave explains that he risked a LOT to get this chance (calling Conan Amra, his old name as a corsair). He tells Conan that he stole Shukeli the jailer's keys without him knowing about and holds the keys tauntingly in front of him. Conan is desperate at this point and offers 10,000 gold lunas. Conan raises the price to 15,000 AND offers a palace in Poitan but the Black guy AGAIN refuses. Conan gets angry and assumes Shukeli sent the guy there to mock him.

The black guard explains that actually no. Shukeli doesn't know what's going on. He explains to Conan that he knows Conan from when Conan was a corsair. He had been a chief alongside his brother King Ajaga before Conan and his crew torched the city of Abombi to the ground. Ajaga died in front of the gates of the palace while he fled (later getting caught by Stygian slavers and sold to the north.) Conan offers "your weight in gold pieces" but the Black guy simply says that the price he wants is Conan's head. Conan first strains against his shackles to avoid his fate.....but then tenses when he sees that the snake has returned. The Black guy however is too caught up in his moment of triumph to notice, gloating madly about how Tsotha will never know because the demons will have "torn the bones from your chains". He raises his sword to strike....and promptly gets eaten by the snake. As luck would have it both the sword AND the keys are moved to RIGHT near where Conan is. Conan manages to grab the keys by slipping off his sandal and using his toes (seems to me that Tsotha should have secured Conan's legs as well.) Anyway Conan frees himself and takes the sword as well. He rushes to the entrance but unfortunately the grill shuts quickly as laughter emanates in the background. Shukeli the jailer comes up and laughs in Conan's face, but unfortunately he fails to realize that Conan is armed, which allows Conan to kill him. Unfortunately for Conan the bolt is too hard for his sword to cut (although there are some dents made by creatures from the labyrinth which in itself raises a lot of horrifying implications) and he can't afford to break his only weapon so he has no option but to go deeper into the Labyrinth and hope that maybe he can find another way out. So he takes a torch from above his cell and heads into the darkness

Conan continues on, sticking to the main corridor and keeping an eye out for traps. Suddenly he hears what sounds like a woman weeping sadly, and assuming that this is another of Tsotha's victims heads down a tunnel to try and find them. To his horror when he reaches the source it's not a woman at all, but a monster that again can be better described in the text.

"Its unstable outlines somewhat suggested an octopus, but its malformed tentacles were too short for its size, and its substance was a quaking, jelly-like stuff which made him physically sick to look at. From among this loathsome gelid mass reared up a frog-like head, and he was frozen with nauseated horror to realize that the sound of weeping was coming from those obscene blubbery lips." So yeah. Creepy. Notably the creature starts LAUGHING when Conan is close enough. Conan is scared and realizes that in this case a sword might not work. So he runs, and scarily enough the creature FOLLOWS him. What really bothers Conan is how the laughter of the creature sounds JUST like the laughter of the women of Shadizar the wicked. This disconnect makes Conan feel like he's just witnessed the violation of nature. He tries to run back towards the corridor but somehow crosses a small chamber where two tunnels meet (was it there before or did he take a wrong turn?) Conan steps on something before he can check it and he ends up falling deeper into the tunnels. He also looses his torch, which was extinguished meaning that Conan's basically wandering in the dark at this point. With no other option he chooses a random tunnel and heads down it, before his instincts cause him to halt. Just in time as it happens, seeing as when he checks it out (by crouching on all fours and reading out) he discovers that there was indeed a pit in front of him. He reaches out with his sword and finds that while he COULD possibly make the jump he's clearly made the wrong turn.

Conan feels a wind rise and while he tries to convince himself that the well leads to the outside world his instincts tell him something is wrong. He's BELOW the hill, far deeper than anything so how are their winds? As he backs up something floats out of the well; he doesn't know what it is because of how dar it is but he feels a presence. An intelligence of some sort. He flees the way he came, seeing a red spark in the darkness. He heads towards it, but runs into what seems to be an invisible wall. Fortunately at his feet is the spark. Turns out it's from Conan's torch, which still has a single glowing coal. He takes it, fanning the flame slowly by blowing on it. He realizes that he's back in the chambers where the tunnels crossed. This gives Conan a sense of direction, but as he finds the tunnel by which he left the main corridor his torch flickers again. Almost like SOMETHING is blowing on it. He senses SOMETHING in the darkness. As the text says

"yet he sensed, somehow, an invisible, bodiless thing that hovered in the air, dripping slimily and mouthing obscenities that he could not hear but was in some instinctive way aware of." Conan swings his sword but gets nothing and so runs down the corridor, the....thing breathing down his neck. By the time he gets back to the main corridor the thing has vanished. He goes down the corridor, fully expecting the creatures clearly lurking nearby to reach out and grab him. However they don't. Soon the answer becomes apparent. Conan hears the snake slithering nearby and quickly takes cover in a dark corner. The snake passes by and Conan realizes that the other creatures are scared of the monster and so refrain from entering the Main hallway. At this point Conan's not too scared of the monster compared to the OTHER two abominations. At least the snake will just kill him rather than fuck his soul and mind up. He waits until the beast passes and follows onwards. Eventually he hears a moaning sound. Despite the earlier incident Conan's curiosity outweighs his caution and so he follows it downwards (his poor torch is barely flickering by this point). Conan reaches the end and is rather shocked to find.......well this.

"He was looking into a broad cell, and a space of this was caged off with closely set bars extending from floor to ceiling, set firmly in the stone. Within these bars lay a figure, which, as he approached, he saw was either a man, or the exact likeness of a man, twined and bound about with the tendrils of a thick vine which seemed to grow through the solid stone of the floor. It was covered with strangely pointed leaves and crimson blossoms—not the satiny red of natural petals, but a livid, unnatural crimson, like a perversity of flower- life. Its clinging, pliant branches wound about the man's naked body and limbs, seeming to caress his shrinking flesh with lustful avid kisses. One great blossom hovered exactly over his mouth. A low bestial moaning drooled from the loose lips; the head rolled as if in unbearable agony, and the eyes looked full at Conan. But there was no light of intelligence in them; they were blank, glassy, the eyes of an idiot. Now the great crimson blossom dipped and pressed its petals over the writhing lips. The limbs of the wretch twisted in anguish; the tendrils of the plant quivered as if in ecstasy, vibrating their full snaky lengths. Waves of changing hues surged over them; their color grew deeper, more venomous."

Conan is moved to pity by the sheer suffering the poor bastard is enduring and after some searching finds both the entrance grille AND a key on Shukeli's ring. He entered and IMMEDIATELY the plant monster attacks (Conan senses a malign intelligence behind it. Conan keeps his cool and finds the creature's root stem. As the creature attacks Conan swings, severing the root and killing the plant. The poor bastard sealed up there happens to be thrown free and quickly helps himself up while Conan is staring at the Plant thing's death. Conan takes him in, noting he has an "aristocratic" build. The man asks Conan (in Kothic) what year it is. Conan tells him and the stranger is surprised to realize that TEN years have passed (wow.) He asks Conan who he is, and Conan tells him. The prisoner is surprised, since last he knew Numidides was King. Conan explains how he killed Numidides by strangling him on his throne. The prisoner thanks Conan, and asks what made him strike at the root of the plant monster thing (we learn it's called Yogtha). Conan says that he's learned to avoid touching things he doesn't understand with his flesh. The prisoner tells him he's smart since Yogtha's roots are set in hell. Conan asks who he is and the prisoner introduces himself as Pelias. Conan recognizes him; he was Tsotha's greatest rival who allegedly vanished from the earth a decade ago. The wizard explains that Tsotha wanted to keep him alive (probably because he's a sick fuck) and so locked him in the flower. The flower kept him in a haze unable to escape until Conan freed him.

At this point the wizard's powers kick in and so he's able to detect that Tsotha has taken his leave, riding with the two kings he has as puppets. He also learns more about Conan. He suggests leaving but Conan doesn't agree, since he feels that the grille is impossible to navigate, but Pelias confirms that there is no other exit so it's the only option they have. He's still unsteady so Conan follows, telling him about the big snake monster. Pelias explains that the Snake is Satha, the Old One and chief of Tsotha's pets. We also learn that Tsotha forced him to watch as the snake ate ten of his acolytes. He also explains (to Conan's questions) that Tsotha did NOT in fact dig up the pits. They were already there. 3000 years ago King Khossus V built his palace on the ruins of an older city and digging up the cellar found an entry way. He opened that and the pits were unleashed. The grand vizier died so horribly that Khossus cooked up a story about how the Vizier fell down a well and relocated the entire capital a fair distance away. Even when a later King (Akkutho) came back he built a different palace. Tsotha however opened the pits and was able to enter. He hasn't been the same since then, and we also get a bit of backstory for Tsotha (namely his mom was a dancing girl from Shadizar who slept too close to pre human ruins near Dagoth hill and got raped by a demon. At this point Satha reappears, but is more focused on Pelias. They have a stare off and the snake surprisingly turns and flees.

Conan is bewildered and asks what Satha saw, to which Pelias responds "The scaled people see what escapes the mortal eye. You see my fleshly guise. Satha saw my naked soul." This understandably creeps Conan out, but as he's debating whether or not to kill Pelias they reach the grille, where Shukeli is still slumped against the bars. Pelias is amused to see Shukeli dead, seeing as Shukeli skinned his acolytes alive. Conan is unnerved and says that he's dead. Pelias is undeterred. One way or another Shukeli will open the door. He then proceeds to use necromancy to revive Shukeli's corpse (Conan realizes he's been dead for at least a few hours by this point. Man the guards really DON'T check in often do they) and forces him to open the door. Once they've been through Shukeli returns to hell leaving Conan REALLY really weirded out by the whole thing.

They go up the stairs, and surprisingly no one's about. Pelias guesses that the servants are using their masters being away as an excuse to get drunk. Conan looks out the window and is shocked to see that it's now past midnight. Though he hadn't realized it he'd been sealed away for almost an entire day. More importantly he now realizes just how HUNGRY he is. Pelias leads the way to a dining room, and allows himself to settle down on the silk divan. Turns out Pelias is a lover of the finer things in life; hell that's how Tsotha was able to trap him (by drugging his alcohol or getting him drunk). He offers Conan some wine, but Conan insists on pouring it himself. Pelias offers to let him see Strabonus and how he's doing. Conan agrees and Pelias uses Tsotha's scrying crystal to check it out. We see that Strabonus and crew are besieging Shamar; the scene changes to show the capital city of Tamar. Conan's staunchest supporters are booed and hissed at and Prince Arpello has gained control. Conan is annoyed at first by what he sees as ingratitude but Pelias points out that they've heard that Conan is dead and so with no one else to turn to they've embraced the strongest person to avoid anarchy. More importantly "former wars" mean they don't trust the people of Poitan. Arpello however is "the strongest prince in the central provinces". Conan swears revenge but Pelias points out that Strabonus may beat him to Tamar. Conan realizes the truth and also feels that the situation is hopeless.

"With the fastest horse I could not reach Shamar before midday. Even there I could do no good except to die with the people, when the town falls—as fall it will in a few days at most. From Shamar to Tamar is five days' ride, even if you kill your horses on the road. Before I could reach my capital and raise an army, Strabonus would be hammering at the gates; because raising an army is going to be hell—all my damnable nobles will have scattered to their own cursed fiefs at the word of my death. And since the people have driven out Trocero of Poitain, there's none to keep Arpello's greedy hands off the crown—and the crown-treasure. He'll hand the country over to Strabonus, in return for a mock-throne—and as soon as Strabonus' back is turned, he'll stir up revolt. But the nobles won't support him, and it will only give Strabonus excuse for annexing the kingdom openly. Oh Crom, Ymir, and Set! If I but had wings to fly like lightning to Tamar!"

Fortunately it's in THIS area that Pelias can absolutely help. He beckons Conan to follow him. They head to the top of the tallest tower and Pelias explains that their are creatures in the air that men do not know of. Those who have access to words, signs and knowledge can summon them as allies." He tells Conan to not be scared and proceeds to make a long unusual sound. Suddenly a huge flying monster bat bird monster thing (and I do mean huge. It's wingspread is FORTY feet) descends and Pelias tells him to get on. It will take Conan to Tamar by dawn. Conan is confused by this, wondering if this is all a nightmare. He's also worried about leaving Pelias amongst his enemies. Pelias tells him not to worry. "At dawn the people of Khorshemish will know they have a new master. Doubt not what the gods have sent you. I will meet you in the plain by Shamar." Conan is skeptical but realizes he doesn't have any other options so he boards the creature, which rises into the night taking Conan with him.

Notes:

1.) We get more signs of Tsotha's reputation. Unlike Thoth (who is merely called "Set's neophyte" and not even given a name) Tsotha seems to be well known. We also learn that Rinaldo visited the place once and was given a tour by Tsotha (which presumably messed up his mind) and was inspired by it to write a poem called The Song of the Pit (we also get a continuity reminder when we learn about Rinaldo's death). Don't get me wrong it does a great job showing HOW scary Tsotha is as a threat but I'm wondering how Thoth gained his status as a big bad.

2.) Why is the Black guy naked? I really don't see the point of that. He also says "but to a black man gold can never pay for blood." I really don't know what to make of this. It's not the "blacks are greedy" stereotype but it still feels kinda weird. The description of "thick blubbery lips" is also rather uncomfortable. I get that Howard was a man of his time but that kind of statement can jar you out of the story.

3.) When Conan encounters the blob monster I'm surprised why he runs. In the past he has had NO problem cutting down otherworldly monsters. What is it about THIS monster that makes him afraid man made weapons won't actually harm it? Though this does show that there ARE some things that man made weapons can't hurt.

4.) If Conan fell down a hole how did he wind up back in the main chamber? It it magical? There's definitely something weird going on.

5.) In both cases the monsters broke off pursuing Conan when he went a certain distance. Why is that? Are they just that lazy.

6.) Conan jumping to follow Pelias's moaning seems a little thick given what happened the LAST time he went wandering down. Then again it IS a different sound.

7.) Interesting that Conan swears by Set; Also this is the start of the confusion over what the hell the relationship is between Tamar and Tarantia. Maybe it's just early installment weirdness

[lordyam]

Chapter 4:

Recap: We open with an Aquilonian proverb before diving into the action. Tsotha Lanti has somehow arranged to have word sent to Tamar that Conan fell about 6 hours after the battle. As such everything has fallen into chaos and panic. The barons are going to keep their palaces safe, the commoners and merchants are scared that the feudal regime will return and the guy Conan left in charge of everything isn't trusted since 15 years ago he once laid siege to Tamar. Rumors spread and soon widespread looting from the mercenaries occurs that Trocero is forced to put down. Into this madness steps Prince Arpello (who was mentioned back in Chapter 2), who petitions to be put in charge. He also has his agents leak news of the debate to the people of the city, which creates enough pressure that they leave. Trocero is also forced to yield authority in the face of public pressure and leaves after hanging the mercenary leaders. No sooner is Arpello in control then he starts acting like a tyrant; he throws Chancellor Publius in prison, beheads 6 merchants who protest the increasing taxes and allows his soldiers to brutalize the people. In addition he mistreats Conan's harem girls.

Soon enough one of Tsotha's agents leaks word that the Kothians are advancing on the walls of Shamar. The people bang on the doors demanding action, but Arpello is so drunk with power that rather than using logical arguments (like that he needs the barons to recognize his authority) just laughs in their faces. At this point a student named Athemides publicly accuses Arpello of being Arpello's pawn, saying that Strabonus will rule Aquilonia with Arpello as his puppet. This rallies the crowd, and when Arpello orders his soldiers to arrest Athemides the people are able to smuggle him from the city (although many of the crowd are killed with crossbow bolts and horsemen when they harry the soldiers with "stones and dead cats"). Athemides desperately tries to appeal to Trocero, but sadly Trocero isn't interested. He doesn't have the power to fight Arpello or Strabonus in combat, and if he tries his rivals will loot Poitan. As all this is going on the crowd gathers outside the castle, screaming their protests as Arpello laughs at them (though he has his men aiming arbelasts at them for good measure.) Arpello loudly proclaims that Conan is dead and he is king, and he confidently assumes that the nobles are too divided to be a threat. As such all he has to do is hold the capital until Strabonus arrives.

At that precise moment Conan and the flying creature Pelias summoned for him arrives in dramatic fashion and deposits Conan on the tower before taking his leave. The people recognize him (After first assuming they might have been dreaming) and are thrilled. Arpello is shocked and tries to kill Conan, but Conan effortlessly blocks the strike and grabs Arpello. After proclaiming "Take your plots to hell with you" He throws Arpello off the tower to his doom. At this point the archers take their leave, the councilmen flee from the palace happy to be back, and Arpello's soldiers are torn to pieces as Conan laughs from high above (even at himself.)

Notes:

1.) Interesting that the creature gets Conan to Aquilonia just as the sun rises. It works from both a poetic sense and to show that those creatures really ARE that fast.
2.) Arpello's kinda an idiot. He got the council to give him the crown just fine but immediately became drunk with power. He's certainly no Tuthmes.
3.) Why would Trocero rise against the capital? The barons as a whole seem to have a LOT of power.
4.) Conan's harem girls are described as Brythunian, Zamoran, Zingaran and Hyrkanian. Seems Conan is pretty open about pussy.