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Post by lordyam on Feb 7, 2016 21:15:15 GMT -5
Since the series was relatively successful on the old forums (I've since moved the threads to sufficient velocity) I've decided to cover Timothy Truman's Conan of Cimmeria. I WILL be covering Weight of the Crown, even though it's better off as non canon because I soldiered through the absolute dogshit that was Conan and Belit in Ophir whacked out on drugs. Note, I WANT constructive criticism and for people to critique the stories as well if they see things wrong with them. Overall I like diversity of opinion.
So without further ado, let's dig in to Conan the Cimmerian #0;
Recap: The story opens with a shot on Howard's typewriter and the word's "I remember." We get a shot of a road at night, before it shifts to a snowy landscape under the sun. The next two pages show us wolves in the snow, mountains, and finally a row of head on pikes, with the poem CIMMERIA being recited over it. We see Conan having cut down a vanirman, with 5 others facing him. One of the vanir thinks that they need Hoenig and the scouts, but the leader is confident they can take a lone Cimmerian, and that since it's his nephew's first raid they should show him how to kill a man. The leader recognizes that Conan is a cimmerian, but realizes his equipment and gear are "from the countries of the East!" He guesses that Conan's strayed from the village. Conan says he was returning until he saw "some Vanir pigs that needed butchering" before trash talking them and their wives, saying they will do no raiding in Cimmeria as they surround him weapons raised. One of the men Orsu charges forward at his leader's command, but is quickly bitchslapped by Conan. Conan than proceeds to redirect Orsu's spear so that he kills his leader and than bitchslaps the other ones as CIMMERIA is continued (Conan slashes one guy's throat while he's one the ground in the same motion that finishes the leader than cuts one guy's arm off and impales him). Conan remembers all of the adventure's he's had (Kalanthes and Jiara, Atali, the tower of the elephant, murilo and Thak, Iniri and Ereshka, the toad monster and Nestor). He remembers his final confrontation with Nestor's corpse and holding the talisman and reminiscing before raising his sword in triumph. Conan turns to see the nephew, the only one still alive. He softens when he sees the lyre in the kid’s hand and tells him to get out while he can and never come back. Oh, and to sing the song of how Conan slew his kin. Conan turns, and we see that Conan has added the four new guys to the pile of heads on sticks. The poem finishes, and we get a flop into the eyes of a wolf. The eye changes to a car headlights, and we see a car in the middle of a pleasant area. A man, presumably REH, is seen writing down the words of the poem.
Review: All in all, this is a passable issue. The action was pretty good and the shots of Iniri and the other adventures serves as a quick catchup to those who haven’t read the first series. The poem was great, and Conan himself shows that he’s still reeling from Nestor’s death. Him showing mercy to the kid was nice, shows that he’s matured in his time enough to recognize a kindred spirit (The kid wants adventure). A good, but rather short, issue overall. 8.5 out of 10
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Post by lordyam on Feb 7, 2016 23:53:22 GMT -5
Issue #1: Hunter's Moon
Recap: Conan and his horse ride through the snow. Conan looks over a beautiful valley and river with forests on it. Conan remembers that it's been three years since he left (that makes him....18? 19?) Conan remembers all the badassery he got up to (prisoner of kings (don't know what that is) enemy of priests (Thoth Amon) pillager of temples (The damned city, the temple of tiamat). Conan knows he will be more before his life is over (and Conan's already accomplished more in 18 years of life than most people do in 60) and realizes that he doesn't know why he's come home. Just that his heart pulled him here. What's more, he made the stupid mistake of trying to get home by going through the passes in winter since "these were treacherous trails, where the ice and snow could snap bones like frozen kindling and the winds were as cruel and biting as an arrows edge." As if on cue Conan's horse is slain with an arrow to the throat, and as Conan topples from the horse he bangs his head on a rock. We see three vanirmen, one of whom Borri is holding a bow and arrow. The leader tells one of them to check Conan and when he sees Conan has injured himself in the rocks, he assumes the big lug is dead and asks for help stripping Conan's saddle from the horse. Conan disarms the guy of his spear and impales him through the throat. One of the vanirmen is revealed to be the dead shmuck's brother, but he isn't too broken up (he and his friend will get more money). He even compliments Conan before introducing himself as Hoenig Red Hand and asking if Conan knows of him (this is the cousin the guys from last issue mentioned.)
Conan replies "No but my horse told me he's bedded your mother. Come closer so I can kill you, Vanir dog. Otherwise shut up and cut my throat. Either way the ravens will feed today." One of the Vanir is eager, but than his companion notices someone approaching. Both men shit their pants before fleeing. Conan turns to look and sees a man approaching, holding out his hand and saying he means no harm. Conan tells him for help lifting the horse off him and to get him wine. Later Conan is in the tent with a bandage around his head drinking wine, with the mysterious man saying that he patched Conan's injuries as best he could. He compliments Conan's hard head, to which Conan says "and an empty belly". He notices the food smells good, and the mysterious man says he cooked Conan's dead horse. The two hit it off and Conan asks why the men ran. The mysterious man finally is seen in full, and says that Red Hand's bands are basically cowards who are unclaimed by their own people. The mysterious man claims that there is something familiar about Conan, saying he's a northern cimmerian with the dark skin of the southern clans, with eyes as cold and blue as ancient ice. "Yes...so much like your grandfathers". He than makes the mark of Conan's grandfather on the wall, much to Conan's shock. Conan asks how he knows. The man says "All in these hills know of your clan Conan, just as they've come to know of you". He tells Conan that tales of Conan's exploits have already found their way back to Cimmeria. Conan points out that the man is no Cimmerian. The old man says that he was a traveller who has come to cherish the hills. He says that the mountains have told him tales, calling Conan "grandson of Connacht" and tells Conan to listen and he will tell Conan one.
We cut to a flashback of a man walking out of the mist, and the old guy displays quite a bit of knowledge of Connacht, such as that he was a wanderer but not as hard and wild as his grandson. We get a good shot of Connacht as a young man, with the narration that he wanted to see more, since what little he while scouting with his brothers was unforgettable. We learn that Connacht killed a chief's son over a horse; even though the chief never really gave a rat's ass about his son, he took the slight against the horse as an insult and demanded Connacht's head. Connacht saw this as an excuse for adventures and fled into the bossonian marches. One day he saw smoke and fire and decided against his better judgement to investigate. As he gets closer we find out that the people here are the bog folk, people so mean and solitary (as well as strange) that even the Vanir stear clear. Connacht sees a ceremony in progress, with a mother and two children bound. The mother is strangled and thrown into the bog as Connacht watches, and ultimately Connacht can't bring himself to stomach it anymore. He charges into battle and kicks copius ass, even as he engages in a brief conversation with the shaman. After killing a few people Connacht declares that the kids are coming with him. The shaman decides to let Connacht due this, ominously saying "You want the whelps? Then take them and be cursed for it."
As Connacht pulls the horse through the moors the two boys ride it. Connacht is unnerved by the kids not speaking and promises to keep them safe. By the time the sun sets they've exited the moor and are on solid ground). As Connacht prepares a camp fire he sees his knife missing. One of the boys, a blonde one, gives Connacht the knife back saying that his brother stole it. He begs Connacht not to be angry and displays quite the silver tongue, assuring Connacht that he will watch his brother and make sure he doesn't steal anything else when Connacht gets angry. He even says "promise". Later that night Connacht gives the boys some marsh hare that he's caught, but the blonde one says they aren't hungry, and that the incident with their mother kind of dampened the mood. Connacht gives them a blanket and tells them to get some sleep, since they'll be traveling in the morning. The blonde kid says good night, and Connacht wonders what he's gotten himself in to. He feels bad but he can't babysit them. He decides to drop them off at an Aquilonian farm, since farmers will always need help. He falls asleep and the issue ends with the horse eating, seeing red eyes in the dark and screaming as some sort of wolf monster raises its claws.
Review: Well this was a pretty good issue. The account of Connacht leaving differs from born on the battlefield but the rest of the story was absolutely top notch. Connacht as a young man is a likable chap; he's somewhat hot headed but he doesn't stand around and let people suffer. The fight sequence was good, and there was overall an air of dread. From the moment the two Vanir run from the old man you get the feeling that SOMETHING is happening; the ominous declaration of the shaman and the behavior two mysterious boys makes it clear that there's something off about the kids but leaves you intrigued and wanting to know more. Another thing that stands out is the art; I didn't like it at first, but honestly, it's grown on me. It's a great start to the series proper. 8.5 out of 10.
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Post by lordyam on Mar 2, 2016 0:37:23 GMT -5
Alright. I had a recap in the works a month ago but lost it. I've only now worked up the motivation to finish it.
So let's dig into
Issue #2: Mark of the Wolf
Recap: The Old man asks Conan if he's told Connacht's story well enough so far. Conan says he's done a good enough job, but his grandfather would have told the story better. The old guy say's he'll endeavor to tell it better and the two have a short conversation that culminates in the old guy asking Conan if he's going to stay forever like his grandfather did. Conan is put off and tells the old guy to continue his tale, which the old guy agrees to do.
Back in the flashback Connacht wakes up the two boys, telling them he wants put distance between them and the marsh people, and that if they travel hard they can reach the border kingdoms by nightfall. He goes to get the pony.....and finds it's bloody remains. The old guy makes a comment about how "lives spent waiting for the kiss of a war-knife upon your slumbering throats have taught you cimmerians to sleep lightly." Connacht wonders what the fuck could have killed the pony without waking him, and starts to briefly remember something told by the old crones of the tribe. He pushes them back, but we see wolf tracks. The blonde kid asks why it didn't kill them too (notice that we see the black eyed kid glaring) and Connacht assumes it was because the beast had it's share of horseflesh. He decides to be on guard even though the beast only seems to hunt at night before discarding the saddle, cursing that he killed a chief's son for the horse. They walk on, and eventually reach the border kingdoms, finding a farm just before evening. Connacht pacifies the farmer and is able to persuade him to let them stay the night on the condition they work for their keep and leave the next day.
Connacht makes sure the boys help out and that the farmer notices (strangely we learn the farmer is a gunderman). As night begins to fall Connacht sees the blonde kid playing with the Gunderman's daughter and is happy. The black haired boy is just staring at them angrily, and Connacht can't help but be nervous. He breaks up the boy and girl and tells the girl to go to bed. Later that night Connacht is woken up by the farmer poking him in the face with a pitchfork demanding to know where his daughter is (though he doesn't say it's his daughter, just where is she.) Connacht incapacitates him and demands answers. The gunderman finally realizes that Connacht is innocent and fully explains what happened. He heard his daughter cry out and when he and his wife found the bed it was empty. Connacht denies doing anything and says the boys were in the loft, but he agrees to help the father. The father wants to search the woods, but Connacht says he'll go alone. Someone needs to protect the womenfolk (ok maybe the gunderman aren't quite the same as cimmerians) and that a hunter and tracker will have more of a chance. That and he has a sword. Connacht eventually finds tracks, recognizing it as the wolf (or creature that's like a wolf) has tracked them.
As Connacht continues on, he hears a scream of terror and Pain. Connacht reaches a clearing and find's the girl's dismembered corpse (the flesh has been torn from her torso.) Suddenly a grey wolf creature lunges at him. Connacht finally recognizes the beast, and even remembers the name from the legends. It's a wolf kind, a man who walks like a wolf, and one of the many prehuman races that tried to rule over humanity (the wolves fought the serpents for slaves. Noticably one of the few interesting things the kull comic did was introduce a third of these races, the bird people). Connacht fights the beast, knocking it into a tree with a punch but the beast recovers and it's speed and agility (which Connacht realize are every bit as potent as what the legends say) overpowers Connacht and disarms him as well as injuring him and pinning him to a tree. Connacht stares into it's eyes and sees that this beast is simply evil. It kills because it enjoys it, rather than for food. Suddenly they both hear another sound and ANOTHER wolf kind, this one with black fur lunges and grabs the grey one. Connacht watches, unsure of whether or not they're fighting because they both want to kill him and don't want to share. As he wonders whether or not there's another reason he ultimately decides it doesn't matter and instead uses the opportunity to free himself and grab his sword. As grey wolf overpowers black wolf (scratching it's eye) it gives a triumphant howl and moves forwards to kill him. Connacht sees the opportunity and cuts it in half from behind. The black wolf gets up and scampers away, and to Connacht's utter shock the grey wolf transforms into....the blonde boy. Connacht realizes the implications and sure enough when the smoke clears we see the black wolf turn into....the black haired little one. The boy thanks him and runs off into the mists.
Conan is shocked and realizes that the old guy knows it too well. He draws his sword and the old hermit takes off the cloth covering his eye, revealing that claw mark scars on his eyes. Turns out the hermit IS the black haired little boy, and he's waited years to tell the tale. He explains he finally discovered the strength to stand up to his evil brother and fought, but lost his eye. Conan calls him a monster and says he should kill him, but the old guy is undaunted. He says he's used to mankind's scorn hence why he lives in the hills. He also explains what happened before the burning of his mom. The mom had concealed it for years, locking the two up at night and bringing them small animals. Eventually the blonde brother broke out and discovered the joy of killing, starting with livestock before graduating to human flesh (just like a serial killer. Torturing animals before torturing people). The hermit himself had no desires and tried to stop him; unfortunately the blonde one was cunning and manipulative and managed to gain control over him.
Conan is sceptical, saying they both bore the curse, and the hermit says that's true but not as he believes. He explains that the blonde one's curse didn't come from the part of them that was animal...but the part that was man. He walks out of the cave, explaining that his brother was the curse on him, not that he was wolf kind. He stands n a pack of wolves, explaining that THEY are his true brothers. He walks into the snow, saying that Conan is like them and that he will find his pack someday. Whether it's in Cimmeria or elsewhere, whether his days will end in these hills or elsewhere....that remains to be seen. Conan watches them vanish into the snow.
Review: Well this was a damn good issue. The art in Connacht's flashbacks have grown on me, and I LOVED the plot twist about how it was the little blond boy who was the monster while the seemingly dark black haired one was the innocent. It's like any good plot twist. It seems shocking but when you reread it it's like "OH MY GOD, they were setting it up all along". The Black haired one's surliness? Resentment at his situation. The blonde hair's seeming innocence? Many evil people have hidden behind a mask of innocence. It also makes his savage murder of the farmer's daughter so much more horrible; he had played with this girl barely an hour or two before and he has no problem savagely dismembering her. The reveal of the hermit as the black haired one was also well played; it explains why the Vanir ran away in terror when he showed up. They knew what he was and decided "fuck this we're out of here." Aside from the confusion over the border kingdoms being described with the gunderland this was a damn good issue, with supernatural horror and weirdness to make Robert E Howard proud. 9 out of 10.
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Post by lordyam on Mar 9, 2016 19:08:13 GMT -5
Recap: Conan walks through the snow, musing that this is the time of the starving moon. Game is so scarce that panthers hunt their own kind for meat. Conan remembers that his grandfather told him that the starving moon was Crom's way of culling the weak; the hills are not to provide for the children of Crom. They must fend for themselves. Conan notices a trail and continues on, eventually spying a moose in the distance. Conan reflects that he's eaten pretty badly these last two nights (he's only had bone marrow from hare, and snow.) He'll eat like a chieftain tonight. He throws his spear and it hits at the exact same time as another spear. Conan is shocked by this and demands whoever did this show themselves. Sure enough a hooded figure emerges. Conan, assuming it's a boy, tells them to back off for the stag is his. The hooded figure throws back her hood and it's.....Caollan. The girl Conan was sleeping with at the beginning of issue #32. Wow. She mocks Conan, saying he's been away so long he can't recognize a Cimmerian woman. Conan remembers the time they slept together (since it was his first time) and states how much she has grown. Caollan says that much has changed and tells Conan to get away from the deer "Lest I make a pretty necklace for you from your own guts". Conan offers to go with her to find a warm cave and talk. Caollan refuses but is willing to split the elk in half (threatening to slit his throat if he refuses.) Conan angrily disarms her and expresses anger since he was expecting a warm greeting from someone from his village. However, he agrees to the compromise and cuts half the deer for her. Conan is confused, saying he never did her harm.
Caollan tells Conan that she's no longer part of his tribe; after her dad died due to wounds sustained at Venarium her mother married someone from the northern border tribes. Conan asks if she's married to a northern man as well. Caollan says not yet but doesn't elaborate. Conan realizes she's running from someone and asks who, but at that moment he gets three signs that the pursuers are here. First he smells sweat and old leather, than he hears chainmail against armor, and finally an arrow is shot landing right in front of his foot in a clear warning shot. Turns out the pursuers are Aesirmen. One of them, Thorgeir wants to kill Conan and take Caollan. As it turns out though the leader is one of the unnamed Aesir Conan befriended during the Vanir hunt WAY back in the first series so he gives Conan the opportunity to hand Caollan over. Conan is disappointed but the leader, Horsa, says they can still be friends if Conan does so. The witch accompanying them tells Conan he'd better accept the offer or else Ymir might hurt him. Conan bluntly refuses, asking when Aesir decided the fate of Cimmerian women. The Witch explains that it was in fact Caollan's people who gave her to them. Turns out that for the past ten years the Aesir and Cimmerians have had a blood truce (which would explain why the Cimmerians never fought the Aesir). Unfortunately "a winter past" Breccan, the son of one of the Cimmerian Chiefs, killed the son of Wulfhere the Aesir high chieftain. Caollan was given to Wulfhere as a peace offering. Before they could marry Caollan fled.
Horsa cuts in at this point to explain that they've been tracking her ever since, and that Wulfhere doesn't care what state she's returned in. He once more asks Conan to stand down, due to their friendship. Conan refuses, since he isn't going to be bullied by Aesir (I thought he grew out of his prejudice). Thorgeir decides the talk has gone on long enough and charges with his men. Conan immediately kills two, and Caollan kills one (though it is stated that the one she killed was more experienced). Apparently Conan forgot that unlike the women of the south Cimmerian women kick ass. Thorgeir pushes Conan and Caollan back to the ledge while Horsa vainly tries to get him to pull back, and Thorgeir orders his men back. Conan is his. He challenges Conan to see if he can face a real warrior, belittling his accomplishments. Caollan notices that the section of the cliff between them and the aesir is cracking, so breaks the crack and he and Caollan ride down on the section of the cliff that's intact. He tells Thorgeir that "you'll get your answer some other day." Horsa knocks Thorgeir to the ground, saying that Thorgeir got half their men killed due to his bravado and that the only reason he isn't killing him now is because he still needs him. No one doubts that Caollan and Conan are alive so they head off after them.
Later on the sun has set, and Conan leads Caollan to a cave. Because of how dangerous the ice paths are at night, they can stop safely and light a fire. Caollan asks Conan about his deeds and Conan doesn't really give an answer (he gives an answer but it's evasive). Caollan asks why Conan left and Conan asks her if she remembers his grandpa's stories. Caollan admits she does, and Conan says "I remember too". We get another flashback, this time in the desert. We learn that after the wolf kind fight Connacht made his way through aquilonia down the road of kings. By the time he reached shem he had no money for food, so he tried to steal relics from an oasis shrine. Unsurprisingly this pissed off the guardians, who chased Connacht until he wounded two and killed one before making his escape. Eventually he made his way to the city in order to sell the goods. After getting food and gold he wanders along and comes across a merchant being threatened by robbers. Because a.) the merchant was old b.) the thieves smelled and c.) Connacht was drunk he decided to intervene where he normally would have left the old man to die and instead saved him. One of the thieves died and the other fled in terror. The old man compliments the weapon Connacht used (which Connacht made himself) and after introducing himself as Esa offers him a job. Esa's responsible for making the statues of the sea gods that border the harbor and he needs someone who can handle a forge. Connacht became the master smith in charge of building the statues, and Esa ensured that a slave bought him food and water five times a day. Connacht thanks the slave girl and they hit it off. Connacht goes to visit her that night, but finds priests in the quarter. The priests round up slaves, including the girl who brought Connacht water. Connacht follows them, and eventually, in full view of a crowd of people the slaves are all bound to pyres and burned alive. Connacht watches in horror as the slave he befriended is among them.
Back in the present Caollan asks if the cities really are as wondrous as Connacht said. Conan says they are, but betrayal and deceit are all too common. Caollan asks if that is why he came back, and Conan responds that he goes to where his feet point him. Caollan tells Conan she knows something of betrayal and tells him that if he thinks men are more honest in Cimmeria he's wrong. Caollan says it doesn't matter and they'll split up at dawn. Conan asks why, since her tribe wronged her, but Caollan says she has reason. She admits that she's pregnant and Breccan is the father. Conan asks what kind of man allows someone pregnant with his child to be given to the aesir and Caollan says neither she nor Breccan knew at the time. She's certain Breccan will help her. Conan says it is possible, but they need to survive. Horsa isn't stupid and the witch gives Conan the creeps.
Some distance away the witch berates the men for their incompetence and decides to resort to drastic measures. Cutting her hand and letting the blood fall, she raises an army of demon like creatures called the Skrae in full view of the horrified men.
Review: This wasn't a bad issue and there was a lot to love. Connacht's past in Shem was really engaging, showing that beneath the glamor civilization can be fucked up. Caollan was awesome, kicking ass despite being pregnant and the tribal politics between the cimmerian and aesir was interesting. However, there were a few hiccups. Conan's method of escape was a serious "really" moment and Horsa is serious case of "remember the new guy". It'd be more impactful if another character who had a name back in the first series showed up (also the aesir were all captured and died in the day of farewell.) The art was good, but I honestly couldn't tell that the witch was well a woman until after Conan says it outright. Still, it serves it's purpose and has great action AND foreshadows things to come. 7.5 out of 10.
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Post by lordyam on May 8, 2016 17:18:30 GMT -5
Issue #4: The Skrae
Recap: The story opens with the witch ordering the Skrae (a bunch of freaky monster dudes with no eyes. Horsa curses her and asks what she's done. The Witch says that she did what Horsa couldn't, and that he should remember Lord Wulfhere's axe and beg that she succeeds. She gestures with her staff and orders the Skrae to find Conan and Caollan. Horsa tells the witch (Olva) that iff they fail he will kill her himself for unleashing such horror.
In the cave Conan watches Caollan sleep and reflects on his situation. He also reflects on Caollan, and we learn that she was in fact the first woman he had ever loved (though that was implied outright in Born on the Battlefield.) At the same time, he compares her with all the women he has loved since he left Cimmeria (lets see, that's Jiara, Tiana, Jade, Surna's wife......am I missing anyone). He also feels her belly, hearing her child's heartbeat. Conan hears a sound and gets on guard with his sword. A Skrae pops its head down outside the cave. Conan is shocked but reacts quickly, mortally wounding it and calling for Caollan to wake. They engage in combat with the Skrae at the mouth of the cave, Conan quickly realizing that Olva's responsible. They hold them off but quickly retreat into the cave, with the logic that the Skrae won't be able to surround them in the open (though that may pose its own problems.) Some other Skrae ambush them ahead but Conan and Caollan quickly dice them. Unfortunately it turns out that the cave ends there, and that the floor is covered in ouch. Fortunately Conan sees another Tunnel far above them, so the two set to climbing. As they make it to the top a Skrae appears from ahead and tries to attack. Conan lights him on fire and dodges with Caollan when the guy attacks. Unfortunately this triggers an explosion that alerts Horsa's band. They then set out to track the smoke.
Conan and Caollan run upwards, determined to get out before the heat broils them alive. Caollan wants to get back to her people, which confuses Conan since they traded her to Wulfhere. Caollan explains that it was partially her own accord, while Conan points out that she ended it by fleeing Wulfhere. Caollan points out that the child in her belly would have doomed her, since Wulfhere is cruel enough to hurt the child and smart enough to realize it ain't his. Fearing he would kill her and her kid before using it as an excuse to attack, Caollan decided to head back to her tribe, hoping that since Breccan (her babydady) would protect her. Conan is dubious, since Breccan could have easily offered himself in her place and didn't stop Wulfhere from taking her. However, he realizes Caollan won't change her mind and says that he'll come with her to be safe. As they resume climbing the heat reminds Conan of what his grandfather said about how flame burns flesh while betrayal burns the heart and that both leave scars. The text states that Connacht learned betrayal in Shem. Connacht rushes through the crowd to free the slave but is blocked by the guards, who force him to the ground and than gesture him back. Connacht's employer says that these sacrifices honor the gods and will result in blessings. Connacht is appalled and says that any god who desires such sacrifice should be damned not worshipped. He calls the city men fools and damns everyone. Connacht walks through the city, which now seems ugly and vile to him rather than wondrous. He plans to to leave, but not before avenging his friend. He sneaks into the temple, taunts the priests and then slaughters them. He begins to leave after taking everything but is met at the gate by armed guards. The next day Connacht stands before a judge, with his employer ratting him out for threatening and murdering the priests. Connacht is incensed, realizing how civilized men repay favors like saving your life. Connacht is found guilty and led away to the docks. He's been assigned to work as a slave on a galley owned by the betrayer. Connacht vows revenge, even if he knows it's not today.
In the present Conan and Caollan reach the surface and as Conan helps her up he says they should find the trail she spoke of before "Horsa and his pigs discover us." Unfortuatnely Horsa and the others are three and quickly brandishes his weapon alongside his men. However, the final scenes of the issue show a pack of wolves, led by one with a scar over his eye.
Review: This was an okay issue. The hunt from the Skrae was pretty cool and it was interesting to see Conan reflecting on Caollan and his past. However, it was largely a massive action scene that while well done didn't really appeal. The Skrae were fucking terrifying but how they kept getting through the tunnels to be ahead was silly. What really boosted the story for me was Connacht's flashbacks. We see that he went through the same thing that happened to Conan; after initially being impressed by civilization he saw the rotten underbelly and saw just how shitty people can be. Connacht also shows an admirable streak; he brutally murders the corrupt priests who burn people alive and makes a great point about how any god that demands such cruelty deserves nothing. 7 out of 10.
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Post by lordyam on May 8, 2016 18:11:16 GMT -5
Issue #5: The Wolf's Promise
Recap: Horsa tells Conan they were friends but that because Conan killed some of his friends (Horsa's friends) he must die. Conan grimly accepts and leaps into action, cutting one man down. Olva takes charge, ordering the men forwards, and to leave Caollan alive but kill Conan. Conan orders Caollan back, but Caollan tells Conan too look after himself; after all she's not one of those city born tramps who warmed his bed in the east (as she says this she impales a guy through the chin and slices another guy's belly open.) Conan reflects that no she isn't. Olva starts uttering an incantation and throws powder in Caollan's face before cutting her arm. Conan is distracted, allowing one of the Aesir to hit him in the head with mace. Thorgeir from last issue orders the guy back, saying he will kill Conan. Horsa says to do it but be careful. Just because Conan's injured doesn't mean he's toothless.
At this point a massive howling occurs and a horde of wolves races down the hill, attacking some of the men and distracting thorgier just long enough for Conan to regain his bearings. He challenge Thorgeir and they face off. Olva meanwhile is surprised at this turn of events and angrily accuses Caollan of being a witch (since she detects magic around the wolves.) At this point Olva looses it and decides to kill Caollan saying that surely Wulfhere will forgive her. Caollan decides she ain't gonna take this crap and impales Olva through the heart. Meanwhile, Conan defeats Thorgeir by splitting his spine and leaving him crippled. Thorgeir compliments him and asks Conan to send him to Ymir rather than leaving him to die a cripple. Conan considers it, and agrees. He tells Thorgeir that he will tell his sons of this day and impales Thorgeir through the heart. Conan turns, demanding Horsa face him. However, he sees Caollan injured and instead binds the wound with part of his cape. He then turns to see Horsa, desperately trying to keep a wolf eating him. Caollan says the beast's eyes look almost....at which point Conan cuts her off saying he's met this wolf before. Sure enough the wolf quickly turns into it's human form. The wolf kind greets Conan as a friend, but Conan says "you dare call me friend when your lips are stained with a man's blood?" The wolf kind says he fights with what weapons were given to him, and that he has no passion for flesh. Caollan asks if the other wolves are wolf kind, and the old dude says that no they are his true brothers. Regular wolves. He tells Caollan to rest saying that he'll find roots to make a poultice. Caollan says that won't be needed since she'll be with her people, but the wolf kind says that they're far off and that such a journey would be unwise, especially considering that she's pregnant. Horsa is shocked at this but Caollan says it's none of his business; Nor is it wulfhere's. Horsa gets angry, pointing out that all his men are dead as well as the seeress, but Conan warns him off says that the wolf kind is correct. Due to the injury and the hunger she won't make it back in time. They'll head to Conan's tribe until she's healed (as he says this he binds Horsa's hands.) Caollan starts to protest but Conan tells her to think of her child. The wolf kind offers to show Conan a trail, while Horsa will serve as a hostage to negotiate with Wulfhere. As they journey on Conan basks in the beauty of Cimmeria. He remembers something else his grandfather said about how the skies are as beautiful as the sea when clear.
We cut back to Connacht. Connacht has become a galley slave under the sadistic taskmaster. Since he wants to get home he'll make them row all night if he has too. At this moment they are off the coast of Argos, having picked up lamp oil and copper ore from zingara. The conditions are hellish and Connacht's workmate is a skeleton of a man who states he will be dead by tomorrow. Connacht takes pity on him and says he'll do the work while the other guy rests. At night the slave dies, and the asshole overseer thinks he's sleeping. He threatens the corpse, and brings his keys JUST in the reach of Connacht. Connacht seizes the opportunity to hit the bastard before breaking his neck and using the key to free himself. He knocks one guard over and than throws the key into the crowd. The slaves free themselves while Connacht overpowers more guards as the slaves rise up. As Connacht faces the guard he accidentally knocks a torch out of the guy's hand, which sets the lamp oil alight. Connacht realizes that this technically satisfies his desire for revenge. After all the loss of the shipment will put the statue construction back months, and since it's the betrayers fault Connacht was in position to do this he'll lose his head for this. Connacht and the other slaves dive into the water. Connacht swims towards the shore, not knowing or caring if any other slaves died. He makes it to the beach, running into a band of Kothian renegades fleeing after their province fell in one of Koth's civil wars. They had seen the fire and want to know what happened. Connacht tells them and the Kothians are amused enough to recruit Connacht. Connacht accepts the offer, riding with them to Ophir and Aquilonia (though it says Ophir is northeast.)
Back in the present Conan and the Wolfkind and Caollan and Horsa arrive at Conan's tribe's home. Conan is genuinely happy to be home, and the Wolf kind explains that he's always felt a debt to Connacht for saving him from death and later his evil brother; he leaves with his wolves, saying his debt is finally paid and that fate has brought Conan here. He asks Conan if he will find reason to stay before vanishing into the mist. Conan holds Caollan in his arms and says he's home, thinking that this was Caollan's home once too. As Conan thinks, we go back to Caollan's village, where we finally meet Breccan and his father Braccha. Braccha explains the situation, cutting Breccan off and reminding him that the treaty will be in peril if she escape. He tells Brecchan that he'd better track her down, since he started this whole damn mess and only dodged the bullet because Caollan offered herself up. He says he loves his son, but that he'd better fix things. Breccan promises that he will. Braccha says that he shouldn't make an oath lightly, and that as much as he loves him, if he fails to return with Caollan or her head than he will offer Brecchans up. After all, what good is a man if his word has no value?
Review: This was a great issue. The fight sequence was awesome, and the return of the wolves was damn cool. We also see that Caollan is still a badass. Connacht's flashback was also pretty good (though the fight on the ship was a little hard to follow.) There were a few nitpicks (apparently Ophir is northeast of argos or something) but overall it was a damn fine issue. 9 out of 10.
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Post by lordyam on May 10, 2016 17:31:12 GMT -5
Issue #6: Homecoming
Recap: A guard....wolf senses something and begins barking. His handler and fellow sentry gets into position and demands whoever is there to show himself. In the shadows Conan tells the boy to put the spear down before he kills himself, but to his credit the boy stays strong and refuses. Conan asks where the chief is and demands to be taken to him. Turns out the Chief is already there, since he feels the need to keep watch too. When he demands Conan reveal himself and turn over his sword. Conan refuses, and the Chieftain, amused by this, asks to now what ails the person Conan carries, warning that if she carries the pox he'll feed Conan's guts to the crows. Conan emerges and scolds the Chieftain joking that the'd be better in the cold hills. the The Chieftain finally recognizes Conan and the two share jokes while Gwydd (the chieftain) tells Conan of the tales he's heard. We also find that Gwydd lost his arm to pictish raiders. He's not bothered. He has the limb that matters. At this point people realize Horsa is there, and Conan explains the situation of Caollan fleeing from the North. When Caollan says Breccan's name Conan says he'll get word to Breccan, but that Caollan stays with Conan till he comes. He warns Gwydd that her trouble is following them now. Gwydd is nonchalant; trouble is life and caollan was born in their tribe. Happily, Conan's mother is still alive, though Gwydd says they'll wait till morning to rouse her. He leads Conan and the others to the hut, asking Conan to tell him about his adventures.
As the sun rises we see that Conan has indeed dispatched two runners to alert Brecan. Conan himself kept watch over Caollan like he promised. He reflects on what his grandpa told him, and as Caollan wakes, he jokes that she would sleep her life away. Caollan admits that she had a strange dream of her at the village with Breccan. Conan assumes it was a nice dream, but Caollan admits she isn't sure. Conan notes that she looks healthier, and Caollan admits that she's hungry even as she's stronger. Conan starts to lead her out to his mom's hut. As they open the door they find that a crowd has gathered outside of them, full of smiling people eager to hear conan's tales. They also amusingly assume Caollan is an eastern princess. They lead Caollan and Conan to the council lodge and decide to bring food, all while asking Conan to tell them of his adventures. It becomes apparent that this is as much to relieve the pain of the "starving moon" period, since such a feast is not advisable. Conan obliges, telling them all about Nestor, Kalanthes, Janissa, the monsters he fought, the strange towers he's seen. The villagers ask questions, and we find out that traders have been telling stories (didn't think there'd be traders this far north but whatever.) At one point they tell Conan they heard he killed a bear. Conan says it was an ape, but more man then ape. At this point Conan's mother walks in and the two hug. She's surprised to recognize Caollan, and also realizes she's pregnant. Conan has to explain he's not the father. Conan's mom is shocked when Caollan tells her about Conan's trip home, because of how dangerous he was. Fialla (Conan's mother) compares Conan with his grandfather, explaining how Conan's grandmother told her all about how Connacht came to them.
At this point we cut to the flashback part of the story. Connacht is in the mountains. We learn that while few leave Cimmeria, fewer still enter the gray mountains....while no one enters during the starving moon. Connacht however is doing so, whether because he's a fool or he wants to go home. Awe go even further into the past, and find that Connacht spent several years with mercenaries; while Connacht liked their company, years of fighting had made them into monsters. Connacht was a scout and a friend, even as the battles he were in were different from the raids of his youth. However, he once more saw the dark side of civilization. At one point he and the others had been hired by a king; the son approached them that night and offered them gold to turn on his father. The mercenaries agreed and turned on the king, slaughtering raping and torturing the citizens for three days after a brief battle. Connacht was disgusted by this and left the company. Shortly afterwards he found himself pulled home. Towards the end of his journey (like a few miles away) an avalanche occurred. Connacht survived but his legs were shattered, eventually passing out with the assumption he'd die. However, this is not to be. Instead he sees a woman so beautiful he can't help but compare her with the Djinn or Atali that he's heard of. She explains that she was out for kindling and found him in the ice. She got her brothers after realizing he was cimmerian and they pulled him out. Connacht is glad for it, and over the next several months they fall in love as Connacht's legs heal. In time they gave birth to Conan's father. As Conan drinks Fialla explains that he never again left the mountains. Conan assumes it's because his legs were ruined, and Fialla says Conan is silly; it takes more than bones broken to tame a wild heart. Perhaps there is more richness in the hills than he thinks. Caollan admits that the meal made her feel stronger, and Fialla says that she knows the child isn't his. However, she wonders if his wild heart will be tamed too. She offers to let Conan spend the night, and leaves Cona and Caollan alone. Conan asks Caollan if she would leave with Brecan if he were to come tomorrow. Caollan admits she isn't sure, and after a short moment they kiss before making love. We zoom out to the northeast . The messengers sent have run into Breccan's camp by accident and filled Breccan in. Breccan, however, is not happy about this, and curses his situation. We get an ominous hint that Brecan may value his own life more than Caollan.
Review: Another issue ends and it's a pretty good one despite having no action. Conan and Caollan arrive home, and get a warm welcome. It was wonderful seeing Conan the storyteller, filling them in on the details, while also seeing Connacht arrive home. Connacht's past has been consistently a joy to read despite the dodgy art, and we see that he too has seen the darkness of civilization when the little prince murders his own father and the men he fought besides cheerfully change sides for gold. We see that Conan and Caollan are falling in love, raising the possibility that Conan may settle down....or not. Sadly, Brecan is on the move and one gets the feeling the story will not have a happy ending
9 out of 10.
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fernando
Thief
I'm purist and proud! I hate insistent people! And I only give opinions when I'm ASKED!!
Posts: 141
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Post by fernando on May 18, 2016 15:14:57 GMT -5
It's a great saga! Very faithful to REH, IMO. I also loved DH's adaptation of The Frost Giant's Daughter and of The Tower of the Elephant, as well as The Mad King of Gaul and the arc The Free Companions - they are the best ones in faithfulness to Howard (IMO, the most important thing in a Conan story). Too bad Conan and the Midnight God didn't arrive yet to Brasil...
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Post by lordyam on May 19, 2016 14:07:52 GMT -5
I think faithfulness is important too, but that good storytelling is just as important. If one were adapting hour of the dragon in something like video game form you'd have to do things like make the final confrontation on king's alter more epic and a fight. Xal going down like a chump after all that buildup is pretty lame.
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Post by lordyam on May 20, 2016 2:17:54 GMT -5
Okay, let's end this arc and move on to Black Colossus.
Issue #7: Darkness and the Night.
Conan sits outside in the morning light, and his mom tells him there's work to be done. Conan says he's fixed the fence and is now drinking wine. He points out caollan should be resting, too which Caollan asks Conan if he's her midwife too before explaining she went to get roots and berries. Caollan plays with one of the pups and Fialla explains that the dog has wolf blood in larger amounts. Caollan asks if he will be more dog than wolf when he grows, and Conan says that sometimes one runs away to hunt with it's cousin; most come back. However, Fialla points out some leaven and never return. Fialla talks about how Connacht built the pen and we get a flashback. Connacht stayed for years even as the need to wander filled him. Connacht arrives bringing a young wolf pup that lost it's mother. He thinks that the dog mother Laidi will be willing to share milk. He takes Conan from Fialla's arms and takes Conan with him. He gives the pup to the mother dog and father, who accept it. Fialla follows and we see Conan and his grandpa arrive at the top of his hill before he collapses on his knees. Even years later his legs still hurt. Though he remained a warrior it was harder to hide the pain. He stares eastward telling Conan all about the things he did and saw. He describes the hyborian nations and their wonders, and mourns that it would be good to see those lands again just once more. He starts to get sad at how broken he is....at which point Conan tugs his beard. Connacht recognizes the thunder in his heart and lightning in the heart. Eventually he comes down to his wife, and as he passes the pen he notices that dog father tub is guarding them. He tells Conan perhaps he'll cross the mountains someday, crossing the world and grinding the heads of the mighty beneath his heels. That alone is worth keeping him safe (and who will listen to his stories otherwise?)
Fialla wonders what would have happened if Connacht continued exploring. Would he be a warrior a conquerer? Conan says he might well have just become drunk in a tavern with a fat whore across his knee. HIs mom is amused. She admits that she was worried he'd fill Conan's head with smoke, yet also admits he still taught Conan about the darkness and that perhaps he might look past the smoke. At this moment Gwydd approaches, explaining that they found messengers from Breccan, asking Caollan to come alone. Conan is suspicious and Gwydd insists they can't afford a fight with the northern tribes. Caollan says they should both shut up and that she will make the best decision for her and her child. She will meet Breccan alone in the council hall. She tries to reconcile with Conan but Conan tells her that she's made her choice and to go to Breccan. He'll deal with Horsa. Caollan approaches the council hall. Though she misses Conan she realizes this is the path she's chosen. She is sure that she and Breccan can be together and that their child will be chief.
Caollan walks in and Breccan greats her, giving her the platitudes about how he should have been taken instead and asking forgiveness. Caollan eats it up. Conan sits with Horsa, and after Conan says Horsa's fate will be up to Caollan and Brecan Horsa asks what will happen. Conan admits he still plans to leave and make war in the south. Horsa approves, saying that they war with the Vanir because it gives them an excuse to be away from their wives and children. He tells Conan he'd have made a good aesir, and that Conan should be willing to take Caollan since he obviously loves her. Conan says that her mind is made up and that if he id he'd get his throat slit. Horsa compares them and says that unlike Atali Caollan is a woman he can hold. Why make the choice easy? This hits a chord in Conan who walks off to meet Caollan, bidding Horsa farewell.
Brecan asks Caollan why she ran and she explains she had no choice. She assures him that Wulfhere never touched her and that she owes Conan her life for helping her reach there. Brecan makes it clear he's jealous, so Caollan tries to say they both owe him. Caollan further reveals she is pregnant with Brecan's child. They hug and Caollan asks Brecan if he's happy. Brecan starts to rant about how his father was a fool for being cowed by the Aesir, and that he doesn't regret killing Wulfhere's son. He also says that Caollan and her oath are the only reason his father didn't offer his head to Wulfhere. Brecan further says (with tears in his eyes) that his dad asked him to bring Caollan back living or dead. He said he'd hoped they could make his dad listen, but now...Wulfhere would not accept Caollan to his bed. Not that she's pregnant with another man's child. He says she would kill both of them, but that at least he can escape it. We see a SHKKK sound and Caollan lets out a cry ....and she falls back a dagger buried in her chest. Breccan says that he's a fool, and Caollan tells him Conan will him. Breccan's scouts come in, saying that he should have waited until they were clear of the village. Brecan insists she left him no choice and says they need to wrap the body, they'll take her head to his father. He starts to order them to gather her up... At which point we see that Conan has entered, horrified by the scene. The horror turns to rage and Conan instantly takes out the scouts. Conan and Brecan face off, and Brecan actually manages to land a blow (his tribe are always the first target of Vanir raiders)....then he sees the hatred in Conan's eyes and realizes he's fucked. Conan breaks his blade, causing Breccan too stumble back. Brecan begs for mercy, saying he is unarmed. Conan simply says "So was She." And before Brecan can scream Conan cuts the bastard down. Conan takes Caollan's corpse out
AT dawn the men dig a hole in the loam, and place her body in the cairn. Conan marks the grave with a sword. Gwydd tells Horsa that he should report to his king and that the truce must be restored. Breccan is dead. "Aye. And here is his proof of it." Conan says handing Brecan's head in a sack to Wulfhere. Horsa says Wulfhere will cherish it and bids them farewell. He rides off and Conan is asked if he will leave. What if Breccan's dad seeks vengeance. Kulin, the long boy, points out that no one would want to avenge someone who murdered a pregnant woman, and Gwydd agrees, saying that the northern tribe needs them. Still he'll return the scouts bodies; they deserve a burial since Brecan was the one at fault and has paid for it. Conan says he has not paid enough. Fialla asks him if he'll stay not a week longer, since there is still snow in the pass. Conan says the days are warming. By the time he reaches the mountains the trail will clear. Kulin asks if Conan is going back to the cities; Conan says he is, but tells Kulin to beware. There is treachery there, as well as in Cimmeria. Kulin says he will and Fialla points out that last time he left he never said goodbye. She asks if he will now. We get a tender scene of Conan hugging his mom goodbye. Conan says he'll return someday and maybe even remain. Fialla says she doubts it. As she said earlier he is different from Connacht even as he is similar. She tells Conan to go, and Conan rides off, telling Kulin got watch after her. The issue ends with Conan riding into the mountains.
Review: Well that was tragic. You got the feeling it was coming but it still hits raw. Brecan demonstrates the depth of his cowardice by murdering his unborn child as well as the woman he "loves". He could have easily given himself up and let Caollan and the kid live but he chose to save himself. Fortunately Karma catches up to him in the form of Conan, who cuts him down. Let me tell you I have never wanted an unarmed man to die more than Brecan. Still, there's a somberness to the whole thing. Conan is still leaving, and Caollan and her unborn kid are dead. Conan has learned yet another painful lesson; treachery and weak men can be found anywhere, even in Cimmeria. Connacht's flashback was interesting, a nice interlude before the tragic conclusion, and is all things said the best issue so far. 10 out of 10.
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Post by lordyam on May 20, 2016 2:58:41 GMT -5
Weight of the Crown
Since I don't have the previous issue I'll sum it up. Shortly after leaving Cimmeria Conan enters the valley of Gaul, ruled by the Mad King. He gets on the wrong foot stealing food but fortunately manages to prove his worth by overpowering the guards. He gets taken on as a warrior to pay back his debt.
Recap: The story starts in the thick of action, and we find out that Gaul is a province in Aquilonia (the far western valley). He's a rebel warlord who is tolerated by Aquilonian's king, and is so called the mad king. In spite of this, Zauran, the Mad King, is an honorable warrior who fights with is men. Conan has signed on with the guy and we see him kick ass. We find that Conan is still mourning Caollan's death and that he seeks to fill the void. We also learn that the reason Zauran is tolerated is because he keeps the northern raiders at bay; why waste men fighting the guy holding back the enemy when you can either kill his son or bring it into the fold. Conan sees Zauran get injured and leads the men forwards to Zauran. Sadly Zauran has died even as the battle is won. The people are now without a leader. Even though his son Aron is next in line, the people are scared; they want a defender and Conan fits the bill. It also helps that Conan killed the assassin. They give Conan the crown (well the council does but the people agree). Aron rushes forwards, pointing out that Conan is just a stray dog his father took in and that Conan doesn't really understand the situation. Conan arrogantly says the crown is his and that the people made their choice. He pushes the kid back and Aron leaves saying that he will reclaim his fathers crown and that Conan will reap what he's sown. The people lead Conan away in a cheerful crowd.
First Conan is happy; he has beautiful women, wealth and a beautiful festive kingdom. However the narration warns that a warrior is not necessarily a good king. Where Zauran was willing to negotiate when needed Conan just charges into battle, even as the young men die while Conan thrives. The people cheer, but there's an ominous feeling building, as the wolves wait in the woods. AT one festival one of the council members, Aghore, tries to talk to Conan about the lack of harvested crops, the sheer number of weeds and the amount of men who have been killed. Aghore says that they need Conan's guidance since the grain is almost gone and winter almost here. Conan is more interested in his concubine and tells Aghore to go away. When Aghore says Conan's ignorance will doom the, Conan annoyedly backhands him into a well, where he cracks his skull and dies. As one councilman protests the others point out that they'd best keep quiet lest Conan kill them to. A courtier gets music going to distract everyone.
As winter comes, Conan continues leading men into battle the losses continue to accrue, leaving the children widows and elderly to do the chores. There is no longer glory. Just bitter loss. Even worse the pastures are now vulnerable to night time predators. By now snow has fallen making a horrible situation even worse. For the first time Conan has met a threat that swords can't fix. Conan tries using his swords, but this is a paltry measure. The corpses still lie the fields and there are no more feasts. The people need hope not bloodshed. After all the deadliest threats don't always come from the battlefield. The people try to endure but another of the councilmen, Atoth, wants Conan to go and see the people who are falling sick, to show that he cares. Conan does, and sees the misery and desolation which will haunt him for years later. For the first time he sees a sense of death and misery not on the battlefield. More importantly, he's powerless to do anything about it. Conan can't help but feel Crom has cursed him
Eventually a boy in the palace falls sick. Conan begs Atoth to summon the council so that they can save the people from the sickness as well as the boy. Atoth tells Conan bitterly that Aghore was the medicine man, and that Conan killed him when he tried to warn Conan of the dwindling food supplies. He further says Conan was too busy with his concubine to even notice he killed him. As Conan holds the boys body and says he has failed, Atoth says he has doomed them all. At last, Conan feels the sorrow that the people feel. Eventually spring comes again, and Conan rides out to meet any threat. However, he no longer feels happy at the chance of battle. He can't see the role of king as a pleasure to indulge in. It is a duty that is miserable, and Crom's fire is dying in his heart. Conan is still proud that the few men who are able to fight are willing to do so despite their weakened state. An army of horsemen appear and a warrior approaches Conan. The warrior says "what have you done, oh false king of gaul? What have you done to my father's kingdom?" He removes his helm to reveal....Aron. Conan is shocked at this and Aron says that he warned Conan he would reap what he sowed, and that he would return. The day has come. We find out that Aron had not fled in fear. Instead he made his way to his mother's family (mommy has a powerful family). He spent months training to become a stronger warrior, to gain the training Zauran neglected. He quickly matured, driven by his need for justice. Conan notices that the people feel hopeful for the first time in months.
Aron proceeds to give a massive The Reason You Suck Speech, saying that Conan cared nothing for the people or the land, and that he took what they could give. He says Conan took advantage of their fear, and that the people of gaul are good and toiled hard in the summer; in return his father gave them safety and bounty. Conan only took from them. Calling Conan a thief he says he will take from him what is rightfully his (Aron's that is.) He demands Conan lift his sword so that he can pay Zauran's true debt to Conan in blood. However, Conan is just not in the mood; maybe its the cold, maybe its the hunger, maybe it's the crushing guilt but the sword feels like ten boulders and the weight of the crown is like a mountain crushing him. Conan says that he could easily kill Aron, but that there has been enough death at his hand in the valley (taking of the crown as he says this.). He gives the crown to Aron, and gives a sincere apology for wronging him. He says he has wronged him as he has the people of gaul. He calls them Aron's people and hands the crown out. Aron takes it bemusedly, and Conan says to the King and put away thoughts of revenge. He rides off saying any who follow will die at his hand. The narration reflects that years later Conan will take another crown after many years adventures, and this time by force. However this time he will rule as a wise and righteous king. More leader than warrior.
Review: This is a weird story. On it's own merit's it's fucking fantastic. We have a clear arc of Conan starting out as an arrogant fool, and learning the hard way that there's more to kingship than swinging a sword. The sense of misery and desolation was just heartbreaking, and Conan being dragged through the ringer is sad rather than rewarding. Even then Conan isn't malevolent. just stupid. He sees the throne as a way to escape his sense of loss from Caollan's death, and once he sees the devastation he immediately feels terrible. The ending with Aron was one of those rare cases where the anti climax actually works. Aron is all pumped to do battle....and Conan instead does the mature thing and stands down, apologizing for what he's done.
At the same time, it feels MASSIVELY out of place in Hyboria. Going by established canon Conan wasn't ever a king until he overthrew Numidedes. I get what Robertson was trying to do (having it that after learning the hard way that there's more to leadership than swinging a sword) but I never bought Conan being THAT selfish or short sighted. More importantly you could have Conan pick up maturity simply by serving alongside mercenaries and seeing what happens when idiots make the decisions. Or by establishing a rapport he cares for them enough to realize "I'm responsible for them....shit I better be careful."
If this was another character in Hyboria, or another universe, it would be much better. 8 out of 10
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Post by lordyam on May 22, 2016 20:37:15 GMT -5
"In professor Farnsworth voice" GOOD NEWS EVERYONE. It's time for the next adaptation of a Howard Tale. This time it's Black Colossus, one of my personal favorites.
BLACK COLOSSUS PART 1 THE SCORPION
Recap: We open with the sacking of Kuthchemes by the Hyborian barbarians on their way to Stygia. Acheron has fallen and Stygia is next on the hit list. For now, the barbarians try to force themselves into the temple of Thugra Khotan, the great leader of Kuthchemes. As his acolytes try to buy time, Thugra creates a potion by slashing the throats of several naked virgins hanging upside down in a hexagon shape. Thugra drinks it and this somehow forms the girl's corpses into a crystal. Thugra is encased in crystal, and the barbarians are unable to breach the gates (is this due to the magic ritual Thugra performed? That could be a little more clear.) As Kuthchemes burns, the temple survives. We cut forwards 3000 years and as a horse waits outside a guy named Shevetas has overcome a giant ass serpent guard); he recites the incantation needed to enter the temple. Shevetas is VERY good at his job; in fact he was willing to confer with priests of Set, join cults and read the book of skelos in order to get entry. In fairness, the Gold hoard inside is fucking amazing. What stands out is the big red jewel in the center of the room. Shevetas touches it.....and is reduced to a desiccated corpse after a long while of screaming. Outside, we see a naked man surrounded by scorpions steal Shevetas's horse and ride away, trailed by scorpions.
We cut to another place, this time a field up north. The forces of Corinthia and a mercenary army hired by King Strabonus of Koth are fighting over some territory that both Koth and Corinthia desire (or well their kings desire). Conan observes on top of hill, eating an apple, as he has for weeks. The leader of the mercenaries and two of his captains notice Conan, with the leader Amalric deciding to beat the information out of conan later. Far above, Conan is impressed with Amalric, though from what little he saw in Yaralet the previous summer has shown that war is fought differently in the civilized world. Conan's somewhat torn by how much the men depend on their leaders but acknowledges their skill at killing. Conan makes his choice and gets on his horse, but as he rides off his sword scabbard dislodges a statue of mitra. Conan stops and looks at it curiously. He remembers what Nestor told him about how breaking the statue of a god is bad luck and how soon afterwards Nestor had died. Whether it's superstition or not he came close to sharing Nestor's fate. Conan decides that while he fears no god but Crom why tempt the wrath of another in his home lands, so he sets the statue right and then rides away. Conan charges into battle atop his horse, cutting down Corinthian soldiers. As Amalric and the spearman captain observe, the spearman captain is killed with an arrow to the neck. Amalric is shocked but decides to focus on watching the hero Conan kick ass and take names, albeit with caution.
As he rides, Conan accidentally cuts the hand of one of Amalric's men, since he was using a sword in his LEFT hand. As the guy curses, Conan cuts down the duke. The general of Corinthia, realizing the battle is lost orders the retreat sounded. Amalric approaches Conan asking who he is and what he wants. Conan explains that he's from Cimmeria, that his name is Conan, that he wants work and he wanted to make sure Amalric wasn't wasting his time. The guy Conan injured earlier is angry and complains that Conan cut his arm. Amalric orders the man, Aratus (uh oh, anyone who's read iron shadows knows where this is going) to shut the hell up. He saw Conan injure him, but he also saw Conan waste the duke. He asks Conan if he swings left handed. Conan says yes, and he can do it with his right. Amalric tells Conan that civilized men do things differently. In Civilized warfare, you hold the shield with the left and sword with the right. He tells Conan to remember it, and orders Aratus to fetch the Duke's cape. He tells Conan that the cape is Conan's first day's pay; he'll get more if he earns it. He also tells Conan to get some armor off the battlefield and that if he wants to serve so be it. However, Amalric will be watching him. Aratus tells Conan that he will also be watching him and orders another man, Ivanos, to get his horse. Conan is amused; he's made both friends and enemies. Just another day. Conan rides off, deciding that he enjoys this new life and that he'll fight with Amalric for as long as it suits him (Though he didn't get the armor. Than again he says he will.) To the deserts in the south a band of nomads are camped out; one of the sentries, Akif, hears something. He moves through some foliage, and walks right into a horde of scorpions. There's a blinding light, and a hooded and robed man stands on a rock, ordering them to bow before him. He declares himself Natohk, hand of set upon the earth. He repeats the order to bow before them, promising to lead them into glory. At least two of the men bow as the rest look on.
Review: Well this arc starts off pretty well; most of the action is devoted to Thugra's reawakening and Conan's meeting with Amalric. All in all there were a few confusing things (how the fuck does Thugra's potion work, why doesn't Conan get the armor?) but it did a great job setting up the next phase of the Cimmerian's life. Conan himself is still a young man and it's interesting to see how he will adapt to this new style of warfare. Amalric is immediately likable as the hardass commander who nevertheless recognizes merit and is willing to take Conan in. We also see the weasely Aratus, who starts an enmity with Conan that will last until the last issue of the series before Road of Kings begins. All in all it's a great jumping on point for new readers of the series and well worth reading. 8 out of 10.
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Post by lordyam on May 22, 2016 23:34:31 GMT -5
BLACK COLOSSUS PART 2 THE MERCENARY
Recap: We open in the heat of battle; Conan has been with Amalric's mercenaries for some time, engaging in their proxy war. Conan doesn't really care about the geopolitical nonsense (basically the kings of Koth and Corinthia want territories they've never been to). Conan doesn't care; he loves the living. Eventually it's late summer and Amalric has recognized the key to victory. He has some of his skirmishers lure the Corinthians into the forest and than has his men ambush them in the woods. Conan enjoys this, since this type of shit is what the Cimmerians are good at. When the dust clears the Corinthian forces have lost the campaign, and will be fleeing to the capital. More importantly, the only major loss they have is the captain of spearmen, which is apparently a job with a high turnover rate. Amalric notes that Conan has fought well and asks Conan if he's willing to take the job. Conan says he's as fit as any of the others, and Amalric is amused. He rides off, ordering Conan to assemble the wounded. Conan can't help but be proud. The other men notice this too, and start whispering and laughing. Conan asks what the hell is so funny, and three men explain the high turnover rate; since the spearmen are the first into battle they're usually the first trampled; in fact they've gone through FOUR since the campaign began. Conan is deeply annoyed and walks off saying he's fine with being in the front. Aratus watches, angry that he didn't get the promotion. Ivanos asks who would want it, and Aratus says Conan is a show off and that "the savage must be taught his place."
We cut to the desert; Nathok's army has grown larger, and he has begun to preach the ways of settite fundamentalism (meaning he wants a return of the old ways AND to get rid of the reformists.) More importantly he's started to lead them to victory. After Nathok drinks the blood from the severed head of a priest, he gives another bombastic speech about how the temple has been restored to Set, how the people they conquer will be the slaves of their slaves etc etc standard tyrant crap. Though it is a DAMN GOOD speech. We cut back to the small town where the mercenaries have relaxed. Conan observes as one of the mercenaries, Cashius of Zingara defeats another man in a sparring match (sparring being what the soldiers do when the town is small the women ugly and the wine weak.) Cashius demands another challenge, and Aratus suggests Conan's name. Conan agrees but says he doesn't have a practice sword. Aratus offers up his blade, and when Conan is skeptical Aratus says that they have to make amends; if they're to fight enemies side by side they should be friends. Conan accepts the gesture and they start dueling as the men begin making bets. The fight comes to an abrupt end when Cashius's sword carves clean through Conan's blade. Cashius and his supporters are pleased, but Conan's want a rematch. Conan instantly realizes what has happened and begins to demand Aratus (who has wisely bolted). Before he can finish there's a loud scream and the magister is hurled out the window with a makeshift rope around his neck. He quickly dies once his neck is broken and Amalric appears in the window. Turns out the king has refused to pay them due to a lack of money. He orders everyone to loot the shit out of the palace and granaries; "BY HELL, WE'LL HAVE SOMETHING FOR THE BLOOD WE'VE SPILLED!"
Unsurprisingly the mercenaries take right to it. Conan doesn't take part aside from finding a few jewels and some wine, and contents himself with waiting for Aratus. Sure enough he gets his chance when Aratus begins attacking a priest and forcing him to eat dirt. Conan gets his attention and then decks him. When Aratus gets angry, Conan calls him out on the broken blade by asking "Perhaps you'd like to borrow mine?" Before things can progress Aratus is ordered to stand down with Conan by Amalric. It's time to move out so they both better get their gear. Conan tells Aratus they'll settle it later, and until then orders Aratus to get out of his sight and stay that way.
As they ride out, Conan asks Amalric where they're headed, and Amalric explains that they're heading for Khoraja; there's trouble down south as they've all heard and where there's trouble there's gold and work. They ride for nearly a week, cautious of patrols, but fortunately the king of Koth still hasn't been informed of the death of his magistrate and the destruction of his keep. Aratus decides to heed Conan's warning for the time being, and on the fifth day they meet Count Thespides and the Remnants of Khoraja's army. Conan smells them from afar, and tells Amalric to stop. Despite a few jokes they quickly shut up when an army appears over the horizon. Amalric asks Conan to identify the banners, and Conan's description of gold striped upon red shows that they are Khoraja's. Sensing this fortunate turn, Amalric orders Conan, as well as Cashius and a new guy named Galan to come with to parley.
Once they meet the army, Amalric talks with the leader Count Thespides. He explains that the King went to Ophir to sign a peace document; turns out that Ophir's King was a scumbag and he betrayed them, capturing Khossus; he may well be given to the king of Koth, to forge a treaty between them. Yasmela, the king's sister, has been informed, and she now rules as regent until Khosos is either ransomed or retaken. Amalric offers his services, since he too hates the King of Koth. Thespides agrees and after Amalric summons the men they all ride off to Khoraja.
As they enter Conan is impressed. He also sees Princess Yasmela standing atop a balcony; Thespides is smitten with her and talks about how she gave him one of her gloves as a token of her esteem (while holding it in a way that looks like he's sniffing it) and talking about how beautiful she is. Amalric points out that beauty cannot save the kingdom from the various threats. He tells Thespides to take him to Yasmela so that they can work out terms of service. He orders the captains to take the men into the city to eat drink and rest. Later at night Conan and some of the others are in front of a cage with a gray ape in it. The others are impressed, but Conan tells them that he killed a similar ape, but that his was bigger (an obvious reference to thak, but also a hint to a line in the black coast adaptation of how he had first seen an ape like the winged one in a hyrkanian city. Here it's khoraja, but unlike a lot of changes this one is pretty negligible.) The others think Conan is full of shit but invite him along, hoping to hear another yarn. Conan agrees, but says he has business to take care of first.
We cut to Ivanos and Aratus fleeing from some whores, pelting them with things. Ivanos asks Aratus why the hell he had to hit her, but Aratus says that the street is full of whores. He's cut off mid sentence when Conan grabs him by the throat. Conan tells Ivanos to stand down since he doesn't have a quarrel with him before slamming Aratus's head into the dirt and making him eat mud. Aratus clumsily tries to hit Conan with a dagger, but Conan responds by punching him in the face after dodging. Conan says that no man makes a fool of him, and warns him that next time they go to war, if the enemy doesn't gut him Conan will. Conan walks off and Ivanos realizes Conan is dead serious. Aratus, tasting sour grapes, says that they'll just leave. When Ivanos asks where they'll go, Aratus says that he knows a man named Sergius, a pirate who fences good for the red brotherhood and sometimes travels to Khoraja to get recruits. Ivanos is hesitant but Aratus browbeats him rather quickly.
Meanwhile, Nathok sits in the Temple of Akbitana, which he has conquered just like he said he would. By now his force has grown to include Thirty nomadic tribes, 15 desert cities, and soon, a rebellious stygian prince. However, this isn't enough. He calls for Father Set to guide him to the one who was shown to him in the smoke. We cut to Yasmela's bed chamber, where a lot of naked women are lolled about. Yasmela opens her eyes....and sees Natohk, who'se body has turned into some....scorpion thing. Well that would kill anyone's boner quickly. He tells Yasmela that soon she shall love him
Review: The adaptation continues, and while we haven't gotten to the major action yet it's still good. Conan inherits command for the first time and his feud with Aratus builds up. We are also first introduced to Khoraja, and see Natohk's growing power. We even meet Cashius (one of my favorite characters in the series). Overall it's a pretty good issue. Ultimate proof that a conan story doesn't need too much action to be compelling. 8 out of 10
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Post by lordyam on May 23, 2016 1:04:53 GMT -5
Black Colossus Part 3: The Commander
Recap: We pick up from where the last issue left off. We find out that Nathok marked Yasmela long ago, even before he woke up. Damn, maybe the minstrels are on to something about her beauty. The only reason he hasn't caressed her is because the spells that ensured his survival held him back. He tells her that this is just his spirit; his body is back in Akbitana. He morphs from a monstrous form to a more human appearance, telling her that she will love him when she soon sees his human form in person and that he will teach her ancient forgotten ways of pleasure. She shall be his queen and lover. He vanishes after telling her he will claim her soon. Yasmela collapses, and one of the women, Vanessa is awoken by what I presume is her crying. Yasmela tells Vatesa what happened. At first Vatesa thinks it's just a dream, but Yasmela is adamant. Vatesa says that it's clear no mortal power can protect her and that the charms given by the priests of ishtar are useless. So she suggests seeking Mitra's aid. In the temple of Mitra Yasmela is unsure of what to do, when suddenly the statue (or maybe just a priest) tells her that I knows what her need is. When Yasmela asks what Mitra would have her do the voice tells her that the only way to save her kingdom from the serpent from the dark abyss of ages (and maybe the world) is to go forth alone into the streets of the city and place her kingdom in the hand of the first man she sees. Yasmela asks how she can be sure but the voice says to trust the voice of mitra and that her triumph rests on her faith and that she shall KNOW the man.
We cut to Conan in a tavern, with two buxom blondes on his arm. They sit down and a man approaches Conan. This man is Sergius, the guy mentioned by Aratus last issue. Asking Conan if he can sit and have a word, he's bluntly told "I'm not your friend, but buy me more wine and you can speak all you want." Surges does so and tells him that the mercenaries have balls, and comments that given all the shit the kingdom faces (he also makes a rather sexist comment about how a girl holds the throne) he says that it's no wonder the soldiers are leaving in droves and that soon enough Conan'll be dissatisfied as well. After Conan jokingly asks if he looks dissatisfied Sergius introduces himself and makes his pitch. Conan isn't interested, seeing it as trading a clean death in battle for a dance beneath the hangman's noose. Sergius is offended with the manner in which Conan dismissed him (as he says this one of sergius's men moves to take some of Conan's food.) Conan catches this and cuts the guy's fingers off. Everyone draws their blades, but before violence erupts some of Conan's friends show up. Sergius isn't willing to start a brawl of this nature and backs down, saying that his shadow reaches far. Conan simply says "Little wonder when it's cast by such a fat belly." Sergius storms out with his crew, and passes by Ivanos and Aratus. Aratus recognizes his opportunity and quickly browbeats Aratus into joining him before leading him after Sergius.
Later, Yasmela is wandering the city at night, long after any revelry has stopped. Yasmela is scared out of her wits; since she's the daughter of aristocrats. She doesn't know whether the voice is a trick or not, but decides it doesn't matter. Anything to save her kingdom. She hears footsteps up ahead and presses herself into the shadows. Sure enough Conan walks towards her, and Yasmela (seeing his manner) realizes he may be the one. She rushes out in front of him. Conan thinks she's a whore and thinking that she wants some sport starts to take off her veil. Conan agrees to play along, and starts to warn her that if she's going to lead him into a den of robbers, but Yasmela swears she's not. Conan is annoyed, asking if she's a hyrkanian. Still under the assumption she's a hooker Conan asks to see her figure and we see Yasmela is wearing rather nice clothes underneath. Conan gets suspicious, realizing that the niceness of her clothes mean she can't be a hooker. Unless her pimp robbed the king's harem for those silks and baubles. Yasmela promises to explain everything if Conan follows her. She begs Conan to trust her, and beckons on. They arrive at the palace, leading our cimmerian friend to conclude she's a maid in waiting, even as she leads him past armed guards. Conan sits down and asks whether they should start when Vateesa rushes down and greets her as Princess. Conan is flabbergasted and rips the veil off dropping the wine in shock. He draws his sword and starts to threaten her, since he assumes she's led him into a trap. Yasmela confirms her identity but denys leading Conan into a trap, saying he could aid her. Conan says that he can slit a guys throat but that she'll need more help then that. Yasmela tells him that Mitra guided him to her. Conan looks bemused as Yasmela orders Vateesa to bring them wine. She and Conan begin to chat, and Conan tells her his name and his origin, mockingly asking why "Mitra did not tell you this?" When Yasmela takes this to mean Conan has seen war Conan tells her how he was born on the battlefield and giving her part of his resume. Yasmela asks why he said she needed help. Conan bluntly tells her "Your brother is locked in an Ophirean prison. Koth is plotting to enslave you. In Shem, a mad sorcerer is scheming your destruction." He tells her that the soldiers are deserting everyday, and that from what he can see it's tales of Natohk that scare them the most. Yasmela in turn asks if the mercenaries will stand by her; Conan says that yes, as long as the pay is good and that Amalric can be trusted. Yasmela than asks what he knows of leading men and arranging battle lines. Conan gives a crude answer about how it's like using a sword. Finally Yasmela asks if his comrades would follow him. Conan asks what she's getting at and Yasmela explains that she wants Conan to be the commander of Khoraja's armies. Conan takes the news surprisingly well (he's more amused than anything) asking how her perfumed nobles would react. Yasmela tells him that they'll just suck it up. She orders Vateesa to fetch Thespides, Shupra the Agha and Amalric. It's time to put the prophecy to the test, for if this is a trick they have no gods left. When they show up Yasmela announces that she has decided to move her forces to face Natohk. Thespides rather presumptuously assumes that he'll be chosen to lead. Yasmela tells him that she has chosen another to lead.....and to their horror they see Conan on the couch eating chicken. Amalric is aghast; Conan is the most turbulent of his men and he would have had Conan hanged if Conan wasn't damn good. Thespides simply assumes she's joking and states that it would be an insult to have nobles serve under "an untrained, lowborn savage." Yasmela puts her foot down and tells him to return the glove she gave to him and go. Thespides is shocked and asks where he'll go. Yasmela says "To Koth or to Hades, I care not! If you will not serve me as I wish then you will not serve me at all!" Thespides immediately apologizes and agrees to suck it the fuck up, and when Amalric is asked he agrees; at least he'll have a short life and a merry one. After this Yasmela has the Captain of the guard to get dressed in proper armor. Some time later the royal guard brings Conan back and everyone is shocked to see that Conan looks....rather dashing. Even Thespides is impressed. Amalric compliments Conan saying he's seen Kings wear the armor less regally. We get foreshadowing of how Conan would remember those words when the dream became reality.
Conan asks Shupras to get the maps, so they can come up with a plan to kill Nathok. The issue ends with a vulture (who's shown up in other issues) surveying Natohk's horde.
Review: The plot thickens; Yasmela meets Conan and makes her pitch. Surprisingly Conan accepts the offer. Conan's first meeting with Sergius was rather odd; Conan could have been more courteous but hey it's Conan. Other than the small fight in the bar (which isn't really a fight) there ain't no action in this issue, which causes it to feel a little slow. Fortunately Yasmela's scenes with Conan carried the issue; I'll say it. Yasmela is one of Howard's best female creations. She's a pampered noble, but when shit gets real she puts her foot down and takes action. Her handling of Thespides was beautiful (especially after is awkwardly nauseating gushing about how she liked him last issue.) All in all this issue does it's job setting up the war. 7.5 out of 10
PS: The early hints of the Mitra statue finally pay off; it seems that Mitra has chosen Conan to be his champion and that Conan's respect towards his statue and his (incidental) rescue of the priest from Aratus endeared the big lug to the guy. We'll see it it pays off.
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Post by johnnypt on May 23, 2016 7:07:48 GMT -5
>>Review: This is a weird story. On it's own merit's it's fucking fantastic. We have a clear arc of Conan starting out as an arrogant fool, and learning the hard way that there's more to kingship than swinging a sword. The sense of misery and desolation was just heartbreaking, and Conan being dragged through the ringer is sad rather than rewarding. Even then Conan isn't malevolent. just stupid. He sees the throne as a way to escape his sense of loss from Caollan's death, and once he sees the devastation he immediately feels terrible. The ending with Aron was one of those rare cases where the anti climax actually works. Aron is all pumped to do battle....and Conan instead does the mature thing and stands down, apologizing for what he's done.
At the same time, it feels MASSIVELY out of place in Hyboria. Going by established canon Conan wasn't ever a king until he overthrew Numidedes. I get what Robertson was trying to do (having it that after learning the hard way that there's more to leadership than swinging a sword) but I never bought Conan being THAT selfish or short sighted. More importantly you could have Conan pick up maturity simply by serving alongside mercenaries and seeing what happens when idiots make the decisions. Or by establishing a rapport he cares for them enough to realize "I'm responsible for them....shit I better be careful."
If this was another character in Hyboria, or another universe, it would be much better. 8 out of 10<<
I agree, it's a good story and seems like it should be a good precursory for his kingship. But there's just a bunch of it that doesn't quite fit in with what we know about Conan and the Hyborian Age.
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