Crom is my Master
Jun 16, 2018 17:42:39 GMT -5
Post by themirrorthief on Jun 16, 2018 17:42:39 GMT -5
I found myself more and more mystified and uncertain. My supply ship had landed on the planet Orn and found nothing but a ghost town. The streets were empty in the one city named Carsonville. No one could be seen anywhere. I suspected something really bad had happened so I rushed back to my ship where my three android employees plus my sex android waited.
WE could not blast off...something had caused complete systems failure. All the ship would do is emit a weird buzzing sound. For about three months we stayed in the ship, I was terrified to go out. Finally total boredom overcame me and I simply had to get out and explore. I would have gone totally insane otherwise. I armed myself and the androids, including my sex bot, and we left the ship at last. I was full of dread, where the hell had everyone gone? the planet had recently reported a population of four hundred and seventy people.
I saw nothing that looked human. Then I heard a dog barking. After some coaxing, I was able to pet the poor animal. He looked half starved but I was actually thrilled to find a living mammal besides myself.
I named the dog Discover. It seemed appropriate enough all things considered.
Then I woke from my pill, weed, and liquor induced nightmares. A dog named Discover, what crap. Sometimes I wish I had never watched all those episodes of Star Trek. There are lots of better things to do when you are chilling. I think.
Im so sick and shaking. Even my toenails are nervous today. I have worked like hell to wind up like this. Seventy hour workweeks and lots of caffeine have not been my friend. The winds goes where it will but I am stuck here. Dogs like Discover run free, why can't we says Bob Dylan. Maybe Bob was on to something but he is a prisoner of his fame and money apparently. Poor guy, he smoked his share of weed though and got to party with a lot of very famous people. Good for him. I think he got lots of poontang too but I'm not sure. He is kind of ugly IMO.
I know they took away guns but I kept mine. I buried them in my mothers grave. So now I have them. The liberal fascist would be very disturbed if they knew I had done that. That are very disturbed anyhow. They think they can help the poor by making everyone poor. It doesn't sound like a very good plan but I am armed so its all good. I can always rob somebody when I get really hungry. Hey it works for Uncle Sam so live with it.
I took my guns and money and copy of Conan the Barbarian no 1 and their car and left town.
The car I took was very nice, naturally, it belonged to the government. I changed the tags and donned a wig I bought at a yard sale. I am blond now and no longer bald. I felt good about myself, especially since I had my guns and money. Our current government thinks it is bad to have guns and money. They are very liberal. Starving to death is ok though because they need everyone's cash to fight global warming and to buy booze for all those big Washington parties.. I will stick with my pot and uppers. I am hardcore. I feel I owe it to the youth of the country to be an example.
I came out of the hardware store and noticed some guys looking at my car. They were surprised to see that I was driving such a nice car and I was not some government employee. "I need to see your id" said a dude who described himself as a party official. "If you are driving a car like that and you dont work for the government then you must not be paying your taxes. " "Wait officer, let me show you something that will explain everything." Then I whipped out my .45. I shot him fourteen times. To be honest, it felt really good. Everyone else ran off and I drove away with my Kiss cd blaring loudly. "Shout it, Shout it out Loud...we gonna have a good time"
I farted loudly and she giggled. I liked her, she was a few months underage but we had sex anyhow. It was damned good too. I let her fondle one of my guns. I gave it to her as a gift for all the nookie she gave me. She smiled and we did some shooting. Things were taking a turn for the better. It reminded me of the good old days before the liberal fascist took over and took away everyone's rights. I still had my money too which she couldn't believe. We ate better than most, shooting our own deer that we saw along the road. I didn't like to shoot them but I had to eat. Food stamps would only get you doritos. I know it sounds crazy. That's only because you haven't experienced my reality yet during the age of the liberal fascist.
Ok, I will keep you posted. I have to clean my guns, read my bible, screw my babe, and skin this deer. Sometimes I miss tv but sex is almost as good and besides there is nothing on anyway except tales about how awful God fearing people are. They say the only entity we should fear is Big Brother. God knows they are right. The last time I watched tv I got so mad I went and shot a man who was carrying a picture of George Soros in his wallet. How did I know it was in his wallet? Cause he was also carrying a bottle of pig urine that he was hoping to spray on some little old lady going to church. Im funny like that.
WE could not blast off...something had caused complete systems failure. All the ship would do is emit a weird buzzing sound. For about three months we stayed in the ship, I was terrified to go out. Finally total boredom overcame me and I simply had to get out and explore. I would have gone totally insane otherwise. I armed myself and the androids, including my sex bot, and we left the ship at last. I was full of dread, where the hell had everyone gone? the planet had recently reported a population of four hundred and seventy people.
I saw nothing that looked human. Then I heard a dog barking. After some coaxing, I was able to pet the poor animal. He looked half starved but I was actually thrilled to find a living mammal besides myself.
I named the dog Discover. It seemed appropriate enough all things considered.
Then I woke from my pill, weed, and liquor induced nightmares. A dog named Discover, what crap. Sometimes I wish I had never watched all those episodes of Star Trek. There are lots of better things to do when you are chilling. I think.
Im so sick and shaking. Even my toenails are nervous today. I have worked like hell to wind up like this. Seventy hour workweeks and lots of caffeine have not been my friend. The winds goes where it will but I am stuck here. Dogs like Discover run free, why can't we says Bob Dylan. Maybe Bob was on to something but he is a prisoner of his fame and money apparently. Poor guy, he smoked his share of weed though and got to party with a lot of very famous people. Good for him. I think he got lots of poontang too but I'm not sure. He is kind of ugly IMO.
Some of the talking heads on tv have very bad haircuts. Why this bothers me is a mystery. I do have my guns though and I am very paranoid. The government is coming after me. That is what happens when the radical left takes control. They start killing people. They start out smashing windows, wearing masks, spraying people with urine and burning cars. And they whine a lot about global warming. When will they learn that God isn't listening to them and he isn't about to change the weather to suit them. Plus China doesn't care and they will keep on polluting because they can. In a way, I can respect that.
Apparently Wal Mart does too cause everything in the store comes from China or some other extremely wealthy third world country. I know that doesnt make sense but what does nowadays? Thats correct...nada.
I know they took away guns but I kept mine. I buried them in my mothers grave. So now I have them. The liberal fascist would be very disturbed if they knew I had done that. That are very disturbed anyhow. They think they can help the poor by making everyone poor. It doesn't sound like a very good plan but I am armed so its all good. I can always rob somebody when I get really hungry. Hey it works for Uncle Sam so live with it.
They are coming for me because someone told them I have some money. It is a huge sin to have money. The government demands all of it you know. They have to build weapons and feed all the government employees somehow. And even the crappy projects and welfare costs money. I answered the door and three very stern looking fellows wearing matching brown suits demanded that they search my house. I said ok but then I shot all three. They looked surprised as they lay there bleeding. They didn't feel like smashing my windows or burning my car or shouting me down. They just lay there dying and bleeding. I buried them in the backyard. Right beside my dog Ralph who died a couple of dozen years ago.
I felt bad for Ralph, he deserved to lay at rest in a better place. I thought about digging him up and moving him but hes been here since I was eleven so I didn't. I am not as stupid as you might think. Besides , if the government knew you were thinking, they would come looking for you too pilgrim. So keep alid on it....all of it.
I took my guns and money and copy of Conan the Barbarian no 1 and their car and left town.
I am officially on the run. I didn't want to shoot three government brown shirts but they should have respected the no trespassing sign in my yard. Maybe they couldn't read, the government prefers people who aren't very bright. The last great president we had was Donald Trump but he was assassinated by the liberal fascist. Bernie Sanders became president and he was also killed, or maybe he overdosed on laxatives, I dont recall exactly but I do recall he was full of kaka.
The current president is an illegal alien. He was elected because illegals were allowed to vote, even if they lived somewhere else in the western hemisphere...all they had to do was sign up for welfare and foodstamps so they could vote. The new president wiped his backside on the constitution and there you have it. If I ever go to Canada I will fix them turds real good.
The car I took was very nice, naturally, it belonged to the government. I changed the tags and donned a wig I bought at a yard sale. I am blond now and no longer bald. I felt good about myself, especially since I had my guns and money. Our current government thinks it is bad to have guns and money. They are very liberal. Starving to death is ok though because they need everyone's cash to fight global warming and to buy booze for all those big Washington parties.. I will stick with my pot and uppers. I am hardcore. I feel I owe it to the youth of the country to be an example.
I came out of the hardware store and noticed some guys looking at my car. They were surprised to see that I was driving such a nice car and I was not some government employee. "I need to see your id" said a dude who described himself as a party official. "If you are driving a car like that and you dont work for the government then you must not be paying your taxes. " "Wait officer, let me show you something that will explain everything." Then I whipped out my .45. I shot him fourteen times. To be honest, it felt really good. Everyone else ran off and I drove away with my Kiss cd blaring loudly. "Shout it, Shout it out Loud...we gonna have a good time"
I picked up this cute girl who was walking down the highway. She said her named was Shirley. She liked my cd collection and we smoked some weed together. She told me she had been raped by her step dad but the law did nothing. They were to busy running down people they suspected were hiding money from the liberal government. "They need every dime to pay for healthcare for illegal aliens and layabouts in the projects" she explained. She didnt have to tell me anything cause I already know it all but a female is a female.
I feel like you got to get all you can cause he government is thinking about making straight sex illegal cause they have gone broke paying for all those abortions and barely got enough money to buy coke and booze for their parties up there.
I farted loudly and she giggled. I liked her, she was a few months underage but we had sex anyhow. It was damned good too. I let her fondle one of my guns. I gave it to her as a gift for all the nookie she gave me. She smiled and we did some shooting. Things were taking a turn for the better. It reminded me of the good old days before the liberal fascist took over and took away everyone's rights. I still had my money too which she couldn't believe. We ate better than most, shooting our own deer that we saw along the road. I didn't like to shoot them but I had to eat. Food stamps would only get you doritos. I know it sounds crazy. That's only because you haven't experienced my reality yet during the age of the liberal fascist.
Ok, I will keep you posted. I have to clean my guns, read my bible, screw my babe, and skin this deer. Sometimes I miss tv but sex is almost as good and besides there is nothing on anyway except tales about how awful God fearing people are. They say the only entity we should fear is Big Brother. God knows they are right. The last time I watched tv I got so mad I went and shot a man who was carrying a picture of George Soros in his wallet. How did I know it was in his wallet? Cause he was also carrying a bottle of pig urine that he was hoping to spray on some little old lady going to church. Im funny like that.