|
|
Post by emerald on Feb 2, 2017 8:18:33 GMT -5
Now here's something virtually guaranteed to help build the serious literary reputation of REH and his Cimmerian. It's a brand new, first time ever breakthrough in video gaming. In the new video game Conan Exiles, the player gets to adjust the size of Conan's schlong. You know, I really hope that this is a joke, and that I'm making a fool of myself here. But see for yourself... ew.com/gaming/2017/01/31/game-conan-exiles-penis-size/ |
|
|
|
Post by deuce on Feb 2, 2017 16:53:39 GMT -5
Won't this open us up to the same crap we had from that chick bitching about the sexism of the Monolith Conan game? How is this a particularly cool feature of the game? Get ready for the Freudian "overcompensation" memes on the Internet.  This drags us right back to the buffoonish, monosyllabic Ahnuldt days. AHNULDT VOICE: "Dees ees mah pekkah. Ees beeg, no?" |
|
|
|
Post by emerald on Feb 2, 2017 17:02:35 GMT -5
Not to get all righteous and indignant or anything, but this is a travesty.
Conan Properties approved this?
Can you imagine any other major series character being treated like this?
Tarzan? James Bond? Sherlock Holmes? Jack Reacher? Batman?
No.
You can’t because the owners of those characters would never condone turning their top properties into a dumbass raunchy joke.
|
|
|
|
Post by emerald on Feb 2, 2017 17:07:51 GMT -5
For a real treat, try to imagine what REH, or better yet, HPL would have to say about this.
Ye gods.
How many new "fans" will get introduced to REH's immortal character as the naked moron you can make shake his junk all over the computer screen?
Hey, maybe they can't put a movie together, but this oughta really get REH's vision across!
|
|
Fayn
Wanderer
Posts: 22 
|
Post by Fayn on Feb 3, 2017 2:32:56 GMT -5
You don't play Conan in the game, you make up your own character. Its an online mmo/survival game where your character starts off unclothed and unequipped and you have to craft and build everything yourself needed to survive. You pick which server you want to play on. Some are more censored and have all the characters start off in only loin cloths, others are uncensored and have the characters start off completely nude.
|
|
|
|
Post by terryallenuk on Feb 3, 2017 7:29:39 GMT -5
Shame they didn't call it something else,instead we get the headlines about this which IMO denigrates REH and his most famous character . Guess they think sticking Conan's name helps it sell!
Terry
|
|
|
|
Post by robp on Feb 3, 2017 8:07:29 GMT -5
Is this for real? And yep - what Terry said +1
|
|
Fayn
Wanderer
Posts: 22
|
Post by Fayn on Feb 3, 2017 12:42:19 GMT -5
The game is from Funcom, the same ones who developed the Age of Conan online game. I suppose they imagined that the uncensored nudity would make the game more edgy and mature compared to others in the genre. As well as add some "adult humour". They did a similar thing with Age of Conan by including "partial nudity", when originally released at least. So I don't know how it will go over. The game is still in early access and not completed.
There is supposed to be an upcoming tie-in with the Conan rpg from Modiphius as well. So the two will be connected.
|
|
|
|
Post by terryallenuk on Feb 3, 2017 12:58:53 GMT -5
Doesn't sound promising! "At this point, Conan Exiles is just another in a long list of survival games, doing little to differentiate itself from its contemporaries. It’s Conan and Hyborian in name only, and oddly conservative, leaving little reason for either fans of the stories or veterans of the genre to visit. " www.pcgamesn.com/conan-exiles/conan-exiles-early-access-impressions |
|
|
|
Post by deuce on Feb 3, 2017 13:04:05 GMT -5
Doesn't sound promising! "At this point, Conan Exiles is just another in a long list of survival games, doing little to differentiate itself from its contemporaries. It’s Conan and Hyborian in name only, and oddly conservative, leaving little reason for either fans of the stories or veterans of the genre to visit. " www.pcgamesn.com/conan-exiles/conan-exiles-early-access-impressionsIt doesn't sound as if you can actually play Conan. It also looks like initial nudity is par for the course with these "survival" games. I'm done getting disturbed about this. |
|
Fayn
Wanderer
Posts: 22
|
Post by Fayn on Feb 3, 2017 13:30:33 GMT -5
You don't play Conan, you create your own character. The thing I am concerned about is the planned tie-ins the Modiphius Conan rpg will have with Exiles and Age of Conan. Modiphius seemed to be putting a real effort in to developing source books and art inspired directly by Howards writing, rather than other materials. Something we had not seen yet. The two video games, not so much. As said, they are mostly Conan and Hyborian Age in name only. I hope they will not have an influence on the writing and art in future materials for the rpg.
|
|
|
|
Post by buxom9sorceress on Feb 4, 2017 6:49:19 GMT -5
maybe funcom are desperately trying to attract more male-gay gamers to play??  i am only interested in the floppy male dangly bits...when the monoliths are fully erect. they are not going to celebrate fully alert big male weapons in a pathetic silly video game. [ what a waste of money & time: they actually paid a talented animator to design and animate floppy male genitals - for an action game full of mindless slaughter ] |
|
|
|
Post by emerald on Feb 4, 2017 17:01:17 GMT -5
Okay, maybe you can't play as Conan, but that isn't keeping people from saying what kind of "Conan" they're going create when they play the game, or declaring their aspirations for how they intend to endow him. And it doesn't take Conan's name off a product that has rapidly acquired fame as the First Video Game Ever with "Genital Physics". www.pcgamer.com/conan-exiles-dick-slider/Check out the many comments. There's even some mentions of REH there. Imagine his pride. |
|
|
|
Post by emerald on Feb 24, 2017 19:52:58 GMT -5
Just in case you thought this prolonged embarrassment was over, think again. The developers of Conan: Exiles aren't content to simply allow players to rejoice in their unique 'genital physics'. Nope, now they want to give players the opportunity to cut them off each other. Yup, they're talking about adding castration to the game. kotaku.com/conan-exiles-devs-want-to-add-a-castration-mechanic-1792046560Hey, another breakthrough in video game design can only improve this proud flag bearer of the Conan franchise. |
|
|
|
Post by buxom9sorceress on Feb 25, 2017 21:33:58 GMT -5
Just in case you thought this prolonged embarrassment was over, think again. The developers of Conan: Exiles aren't content to simply allow players to rejoice in their unique 'genital physics'. Nope, now they want to give players the opportunity to cut them off each other. Yup, they're talking about adding castration to the game. kotaku.com/conan-exiles-devs-want-to-add-a-castration-mechanic-1792046560Hey, another breakthrough in video game design can only improve this proud flag bearer of the Conan franchise. it seems like another extremely desperate publicity stunt? Really pathetic. sick scum like that deserve to lose their licence from cpi? > if conan had ever been penile castrated he would have killed himself. > they should implement ritual suicide for the game developers? [ Howard and his tough texas buddies might have shot them all? ] |
|
